kate is fun

Speaking of Dr Newman...

2011-06-06T20:22:00.000+02:00

This fabulous article by Dr Jack Newman (mentioned in my last post) was just published on one of my favorite parenting sites this morning. Entitled "Breastfeeding Advocacy and Formula Feeding Guilt", the article identifies misinformed health professionals and the marketing of formula companies as the antagonists in breastfeeding challenges.

(Side note: I was shocked a few weeks ago when I entered a doctors' office that was supposedly very friendly to more natural types of birth and parenting and everywhere I looked was formula paraphernalia. Next time I'm in there I'm definitely saying something. As Dr Newman says in his article, free formula and pamphlets have been shown to decrease rates and duration of breastfeeding.)

Dr Newman gives some illustrations of how there is a cultural double-standard with regards to formula and stresses the importance of accurate knowledge and knowledgeable support, neither of which are norms in our society (did I not just say this yesterday?). I appreciate how Dr Newman does not blame women but addresses root causes of the issue. Have a read, and let me know what you think!

Book Review: Breastfeeding Made Simple

2011-06-04T22:26:00.001+02:00

Every once in a while I get really amped up about breastfeeding and here I am in that space. Who gets to benefit? You! Onward!

The most helpful book I've found on breastfeeding has been The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, the epic classic put out by La Leche League. I read this during my third trimester and I felt it really prepared me for breastfeeding Elijah. However, it is a tome, with the latest version coming in at almost 600 pages, and if all things pregnancy- and birth-related don't make you as ecstatic as they do me, if may be a *bit* more book for your buck than you are looking for.

I've been wanting a book that has equally good information but in a more condensed form that I could recommend to people wanting to read something without having to sacrifice their social life. Additionally, there's a lot of misinformation out there so it was important to me that the book be solid. I was at a doula conference recently and ran into a tableful of IBCLCs (International Board Certified Lactation Consultants - the cream of the crop, usually). I asked them what they recommended, and Breastfeeding Made Simple was it. I picked up a copy (not the most recent edition but close enough) and thought I'd review it here. I'm going to go chapter-by-chapter and summarize the high points and add any thoughts I might have. I'm not sure how quickly I get through the book, but I've read enough so far to feel comfortable recommending it to you if you're in the market for a good breastfeeding book.

Today I'll just share a little bit from the forward, written by Dr. Jack Newman, a Canadian pediatrician who has extensive knowledge on breastfeeding. Note that this is not always, or even usually, the case; many peds, L&D nurses, ob/gyns, etc... do not have much formal training in breastfeeding. If you hear yourself being told "a little formula never hurt" or "you can't breastfeed with those breasts" or "you don't make enough milk, s/he's starving!" realize that you already know more about breastfeeding than that person, and get out of there. Many a breastfeeding relationship has been challenged, complicated, or ended by remarks such as these with no alternative information available. I am convinced that the biggest benefit to a breastfeeding relationship is support, support, support! I needed it, my friends have needed, so many women whose stories I've read have needed it.

Back to that forward. Dr Newman opens with this:

"How did breastfeeding become so unnecessarily complicated? As the years go by, I am often astounded by how we manage to add new wrinkles of complexity to something that should be so easy, natural, and uncomplicated. Of course, breastfeeding itself has not become more complex than it was, say, 200 years ago. Rather, it is the way we think about breastfeeding that has changed."

Dr Newman goes on to talk about working in Africa during the 1980s where hardly any breastfeeding problems existed. There were no rules, like you should feed every X amount of hours for X amount of time. Some babies nursed six times a day and others 14 times. Newman notes that when problems did occur that woman was surrounded by many other women who had breastfed and could troubleshoot. In America, where only 13.3% of babies are exclusively breastfed until six months of age (and the few generations before us were "formula babies"), it isn't surprising that this community support is not a given but instead a rare privilege for a new mom to encounter.

To be continued...

Summer

2011-05-31T22:35:00.000+02:00

Summer's Heat has arrived. It took a while, and Spring had to get displaced in the process, but now that Summer's here there's nothing to do but go with it.

Melon Slushies. Tomato plants. Open windows. Running around in diapers. Mid-day showers after hot, outdoor work. or indoor work. or after no work at all because simply existing is sweat-inducing. Thunder storms. Fans. Early morning walks. Ants in the kitchen. Laundry in the sun.

Welcome.

Bed Time

2011-05-21T03:23:00.000+02:00

After 17 months of Elijah sleeping in our bed, tonight, for the first time, I put him to sleep in his own bed. I'm pretty sure he'll end up back in ours before the night is over, but it feels significant none-the-less.

Keith and I spent several months debating the merits of our bed choices, and finally settled on one that was delivered a few weeks ago. I took my time finding a bed frame and then randomly came upon one in a thrift store for 10 bucks, head and foot boards included. I bought some paint so I could give it a makeover, and Keith cut some wood slats to fit into the frame and support the mattress.

While I was setting up the bed tonight Elijah was super excited about it. He kept climbing up on it and laying down, then wriggling all over. I'm using some of our sheets and a duvet from Sweden (from when Keith and I had twin beds, remember?) which to me is a nice reminder of where Elijah was born and spent the first year of his life.

When Elijah does start sleeping through the night in his own bed, I'll feel bittersweet about it. I'll love the longer stretches of sleep and having more room in the bed. But I'll miss having Elijah be the first thing I'm aware of in the morning, the warmth of his little-big body next to me, and the security that comes knowing he's safe and sound as long as he's latched on and contentedly nursing away. But I'm sure that's a long, long way away... right?

Gardening Update

2011-05-18T17:39:00.000+02:00

The Gardener and Assistant to the Gardener upon ground-breaking

I've been having lots of fun in the garden recently and I'm so excited to actually to think that I might actually have some produce to eat in a little bit. A couple weeks ago I bought some seedlings and planted several things. While a couple died almost immediately and bunnies found some others, my cauliflower, parsley, beets, kale, and chard are doing fabulously. Yesterday I just planted the basil plant and two tomato plants I bought at the farmers' market the other week. All three of them had been inside on my window sill and had grown amazing amounts in just a week and half; I can't wait to see how they do outside. I also ordered a bunch of seeds from Seeds of Change that arrived last week (Thanks, Audrey!). This morning I started some seeds on my window sill, and will plant more in the garden later this week. In addition, I have about a million red and green leaf lettuces that have shot up in random parts of the garden. I transplanted some of them into a row, and I'm trying to figure out what I'll do with the rest... I'd kind of like to have the garden be more orderly, but I don't want to disturb them too much, either.

Progress!

2011-05-12T20:33:00.000+02:00

I just submitted my final assignment needed for my doula certification. Assuming I don't fail it, I'll be "official" in no time!

It's interesting how my feelings about certification have shifted since beginning this process over two (!) years ago. The best doulas I know aren't technically certified and it certainly hasn't adversely affected them. If anything, they operate with a confidence that comes from true experience, not a piece of paper. My hope is that I will do the same. That said, it feels like a huge personal accomplishment to have completed the check-list that earns the paper. I'm not always known for my follow-through, so this feels significant.

Now... about that party!

Random Round-Up

2011-04-26T21:11:00.000+02:00

1. Happy Easter! Keith forgot his suit and I forgot to even think about an Easter Basket or anything remotely Easter-y for Elijah, but we had a wonderful time up in Wisconsin visiting two sets of extended family (who did, in fact, supplied a fabulous Easter bucket).

2. What's cooking? Well, I'm making my way through this book by the author of this sight, and she doesn't disappoint. Keith's mom pre-ordered this book for me for Christmas, but it wasn't actually released until a few weeks ago. I'm in love!

3. Friends - we had our dear friends from Boston visit last week, and got them for two extra days thanks to JetBlue canceling a flight last-minute. We talked, we didn't talk, we ate, we reminisced, and pretty much had a gay ol' time. Oh yes, and we got to be adult and to the Hancock Tower (funny, Boston used to have one of those...) for afternoon drinks while Elijah was in the good hands of [more] extended family.

4. Music - Oddly enough, we've been listening to a lot of Jason Mraz. What can I say, Elijah loves it. I have also been putting off rehearsing my choir music for the show we have in June. But, that's what weekly rehearsals are for, right?!

5. Play, play, play! - We've been going to lots of play groups this month. Great for Elijah who lurves to socialize, and great for mama who... lurves to socialize. We hosted a couple here as well, which I really enjoy... Keith and I hope to have many, many, many people in our home over the years, from random drop-bys, to overnighters. And yes, I really mean that!

6. Composting - this is my goal for this week. I keep putting it off because I don't know what I'm doing. But basically, I need to get a bucket, put our food scraps in it, and check it off my list. So, I'm gonna.

Weekend Finds

2011-04-15T15:53:00.000+02:00

Remnants of Breakfast

Last week yardsale feaver hit me so when Saturday came I had big plans for the family. First stop was a community flea market where I scored this lovely single serving Bodum french press for $1. I also got some of those great wooden blocks with letters, numbers, and simple pictures on them for Keith. Just kidding, they're for Elijah.

Next stop was the yard sale of a lifetime (I almost wrote Life sale of a Yardtime there, which, I think, is fair) where everything was a quarter. I scored a gorgeous vintage wrap jacket (that actually had a quarter in the pocket so... free!), a paper shredder, various mason jars and other glass containers, and an old metal milk crate that reminds me of how I hope my house will someday look (the decor, at least). Oh yes, and two brownies.

Steps Toward Green

2011-03-31T04:33:00.000+02:00

There have been some little ways in which our household has slowly become more Earth-conscious recently, and I'm really excited about this! I've never considered myself much of a tree-hugger personality, but something about... age? having kids?... has made it a little nearer and dearer to my heart. And so this is what we've done:

Switched Elijah to cloth diapers even at night - this was something I'd been hesitant to do since we'd tried that in the beginning and the diaper wasn't absorbent enough, and yet I knew so many other people had found a way to make it work and I wanted to as well. After doing some research, I decided to buy a wool diaper cover that absorbs (yes, absorbs) moisture and use that at night. Ironically, Elijah has stopped wetting at night and wakes up dry so it's become a non-issue.

Cloth, Cloth, Cloth! - We bought a giant pack of paper towels when we moved here, but they have sat almost untouched as we rely almost exclusively on cloth in the kitchen. I have a drawer filled with various cloths and rags, and stock the bathrooms as well, so that it's not tempting to just swipe a couple paper towels to clean things up. We have only cloth napkins, and I use cloth wipes (just cut-up flannel blankets) for Elijah. In fact, I'm starting to use them myself if you know what I'm saying. (Don't worry, I still hang TP so if you visit you will not be subjected to my ways.)

Cleaners - I make our household cleaners (and toothpaste, and shampoo), and it's basically just different ratios of baking soda, vinegar and water (and coconut oil in the toothpaste). I haven't done laundry detergent yet, but once we use up what we have I'm going to use use soap nuts. Yes, soap nuts. This week I went through the house and gathered all the random cleaning products we had, put them in a box and deposited them all over the garden - JUST KIDDING - I got rid of them on Freecycle where, hopefully, they will be put to good use.

Composting - Ok... Admittedly we're not doing this yet (which felt so weird when we first moved from Sweden), but I just borrowed a book about composting from someone that promised to give me some of her worms if I decide to go the vermiculture route, and the previous owners left us with a big, round, tumbler thingy in which to compost as well. It's my hope to get this up and running in the next couple of weeks. Once I do, our trash output will decrease significantly. Right now we put out 1 - 1 1/2 bags weekly, and I'm pretty sure food scraps make up about half of this (this comes almost exclusively from the large amounts of produce we eat, as opposed to throwing out food we don't want/eat in time). In the future I'm excited to think about reducing our trash output even further.

What about you - Any green ways you've incorporated into your lifestyle that you'd like to share?

Elijah, My Love

2011-03-24T03:21:00.000+01:00

I am well overdue in writing an Elijah Update. The kid keeps growing and moving and shaking like nobody's business and we keep being astounded. Despite the loads of bumps and bruises, the teething, and the learning-of-opinion-expression, there is the calling us by name ("Mama" and "DA!", not Kate or Keith... yet), the inhalation of many foods, the self-dependence and the acrobatics. Let's recount, shall we?

Elijah's favorite foods: olives, raisins, carmelized onions, edamame, grapes, lentils. After our repeated pleas of, "We don't throw food on the floor, we simply push it away when we're done!" he's finally got it, and will often push his plate towards us - a bit forceful at times - when he's done. A welcome change from the staring us in the eye and opening his hand to release its contents downward (which, if you didn't know, is baby sign language for "you sucker").

Acrobatics: Elijah's newest antic is to climb up on chairs by himself. This probably started because I began bringing him up on a chair in the kitchen with me to help me cook, as he was so interested in what I was always doing up there on the counter. He did really well with that for a while, but I've stopped since he's taken to plummeting to the ground more often than I find acceptable (which is actually a fair amount). He also loves stairs, and while he learned how to scoot down them backwards on his own, he now much prefers to take our finger and go down them like we do, one foot in front of the other.

Language: Elijah isn't saying much yet beyond "mama" and "da". In the mornings, Keith gets up before we do, and when Elijah wakes up he looks to the other side of the bed, and shouts Da! Keith hears him on the monitor comes up to give me a few precious minutes of solitude. Elijah loves to babble, though, and I am still hearing so many things that sound like words or even phrases. So, if he says something that sounds like it makes sense contextually, I'll repeat it back to him correctly to -hopefully- emphasize whatever it is we both think he's saying. We've just started talking about body parts, especially while nursing. His favorite is "nose" - particularly my nose - followed oh-so-closely by "bellybutton". He understands most of what we say to him in terms of simple questions or commands or suggestions, and he is extremely observant. We have a bag of chips in a cupboard quite high up in the kitchen (out of sight, out of mind, at least in theory) and Keith will get a couple here and there. One day Elijah came and stood in front of the cabinet and it was very clear that he wanted something. I had no idea what, but Keith figured out he wanted those chips.

Playing: Each week we go to several playgroup-type times, both structured and unstructured. Elijah definitely prefers less structure, and loves interacting with kids that interact back. Today he and two other boys ran around playing chase and all three shrieked in delight as one would turn around and catch another. It was very endearing to watch. We are slowly getting out of the "everything is a telephone" phase, although if he spots my iphone he goes nuts. He's also gotten really into keys lately, which I totally didn't mind him playing with until he remote-started the car, twice, once while we were perusing a 2nd-hand store for longer than just a few minutes. Elijah love to be outside which is great because I'm just starting to do some things in the garden. I think I found rabbit poop in his mouth once so I'll have to watch that, but otherwise I love that he's getting into everything out there.

Teeth: Elijah has been in a nursing-constantly-during-the-night phase for the past week or so, and I didn't know why. Today I discovered that he's got two molars coming through his upper gums which explains everything. These are his ninth and tenth teeth, and I must say I'm excited they're here. I think he's going to enjoy eating a whole new world of things once he can chew properly.

Sickness/Injury: Man, oh man, has a whole new world opened up for us. I think we've been to the doctor three times for Elijah since January, and had too-many-to-count colds, coughs, fevers, and what-nots in between visits. We are not used to this madness! Add to that the many cuts and bruises, and it's been rough ride for my baby. Currently, Elijah's nose is cut-up from a trip against the piano stand, and he has an actual hole in his forehead from where he whacked a rack corner in a store yesterday. His shins are constantly bruised from we know not what, but nothing seems to bother him beyond a five-minute upset that's easily cured with a little nurse.

In a pretty big nutshell, that's what's happening in Elijah World. He is such a dear sweetheart, and and constantly remark to Keith that he is simply delightful. I love when we have special moments when we are really connecting, like when he looks me in the eyes with a huge smile and babbles about something before bursting into laughter about it. I can't help but join him. During the daytime is such a big boy, reading and climbing and running around, but at night when he's all curled up to me, exhaling in dreamy glory, he's my tiny baby who just wants to be close. Don't mind if I do!

Virgin Doula

2011-03-12T04:58:00.000+01:00

(I hope this post title doesn't get me too many weird hits.)

Last weekend was my first shift with Chicago Volunteer Doulas. Before my shift technically started, I was called by another doula to come relieve her at a hospital birth. I threw my bag together, kissed my husband and child, and zoomed off with my mobile and GPS lighting the way. My mentor doula met me at the hospital and showed me around, and then she left and I was on my own. I was nervous, but I much preferred it this way, just being thrown in head first, where the only way to figure things out is to simply go for it. So I did.

It was different from what I expected, this "being a doula" thing. I think part of it had to do with not knowing this client prior to showing up in her labor room. All of a sudden I was there, supposedly to help in whatever ways she needed me, but not knowing her I didn't know how to anticipate her needs or know the first thing about reading her context. I stumbled along for a little bit, but eventually we found our grove.

I was struck by the medicalized management of her birth, and by the way the system seemed set up to work against her, against normal birth. I was surprised when her care provider seemed oblivious to an obvious risk of a specific intervention, a risk that another care giver was quick to make a big deal about and to treat.

I was awed by how this client of mine and her birth partner worked together, and I felt proud at the ways they shared that they had prepared for the birth (not that my reaction matters to them, but more that I felt my faith was restored in humanity that we are capable of gathering knowledge and doing our best to set ourselves up to succeed.)

I was surprised how tired I felt, even minutes away from the impending birth, as I swayed with heavy eyes and feeling ill in my stomach from lack of sleep. I'm not 17 any more.

I was also surprised at how I was able to be present in a very detached way - not like I wasn't invested in my client or wanting the best, but I thought it would be harder to watch choices being made or actions taken that I wouldn't have chosen or allowed for myself, than it was. Somehow I was able to separate myself from any seeming non-sensical-ness and simply support in the ways that were needed and wanted and almost ignore the instances where my presence wasn't required. Almost.

And of course, when that sweet tiny baby made its way into the world, my teary eyes did not surprise me. Why is it so easy to forget that each person is truly a miracle? Each person started life attached to a mother, formed out of two cells that came together and multiplied, perfectly, over nine months (give or take, of course). It's incredible.

After the birth I zipped home so Keith could get to work, and I scooped up my own little miracle and we nursed and napped as much as I could convince him to that day. It still wasn't enough for my liking, but I made do.

Good Reads

2011-03-02T17:40:00.000+01:00

I am taking full advantage of the library here, especially because it is so wonderful to have thousands of English titles at my fingertips (I must say that I miss Gothenburg's library as well... the cafe on the first floor was really great.)

I've been digging into my doula studies (almost done, finally) and so my mind has been quite birth-centered again. Two of the books I've picked up recently are midwive's memoirs and I devour them like I did The Babysitter's Club books when I was seven.

Cara Muhlhahn's Labor of Love tells how she got to where she was when she was prominently featured in The Business of Being Born (a must-see for any pregnant people out there!). What I particularly like about her is that she knew she wanted to possess very strong clinical skills in order to be the best homebirth midwife. She fully acknowledges that there are risks in birth and chose to be the best prepared for those that she could. I think this really bucks the perception that a lot of Americans have of midwives and of homebirth, that it's only hippy, earthy, Birkenstock-wearing, patchouli-smelling women that engage in such an activity.

The second memoir I'm almost done with is Peggy Vincent's Baby Catcher. Her career started as a nurse in the 1960s where she recounts some truly atrocious tales of how women were treated in hospitals with regards to labor and delivery (I'll have to ask my mom, also a nurse in the 1960s and '70s, if she witnessed like things), and her journey through hospital midwifery and then on to also have her own homebirth practice. Reading some of her stories it becomes a wonder to me that any woman chose to have more then one child back then. I'm also extremely thankful that there are midwives like Peggy Vincent out there to provide a true service to pregnant women.

So yes, I am almost finished with my doula studies. I need to submit a final draft of a written assignment and then attend two births, and then I'm done. I think I'll throw a party when I'm done because this has been a long time coming. And, I like parties. I am working with an organization, Chicago Volunteer Doulas. My first shift is this weekend, so I'm hopeful that I might get to actually support a woman through her labor. Traditional doula work feels a bit daunting right now with the whole "being on call" aspect, what with Elijah not being quite self-sufficient and all. And, as I've learned, not a lot of women are gnawing at the bit to hire a doula who has never attended a birth except her own. So, volunteering seems like a good place to start. I'll be on-call for three different hospitals during a 12-hour shift, approximately once a week. I am a bit nervous having never done this before, but I'm also really excited because I know that I'm going to be a kick-butt doula.

This post was supposed to be about the library but like I said - I'm pretty birth-centric right now so I'm not surprised.

Lunch with Keith

2011-02-25T02:21:00.002+01:00

For TIna

2011-02-06T01:17:00.000+01:00

My friend Tina emailed the other day basically saying, "Where the heck are you? Are you still alive?!"

Oops, did I forget to mention that I'd be on a brief hiatus that would undoubtedly stretch into a long one?

In the past month and a half we have:
moved, gotten colds-flu-repeat, turned one (just Elijah), closed on our first house (yay!), gotten a car, shoveled lots of snow off our sidewalk, lived without a couch (still), slept in pretty much every room in the house except ours while we "get it ready" (I finally painted it today), joined the YMCA, started toddler swimming lessons, and on and on and so forth.

It has, quite frankly, been exhausting, and I keep waiting for my fairy godmother to swoop in with a UHAUL and a babysitter, order us to go out and not return without furniture, and when we do she will have hidden meals for a month throughout the house.

BUT!

I also love it. This is definitely the next stage of our lives, and yes there's a learning curve but it's tempered by so many wonderful things, like our friends here, and the library, and the service that delivers organic produce to my door each Friday, and my current obsession with selling things on Amazon and Ebay, or giving things away on Freecycle, and discovering our new town and its cafes and shops, just to name a few.

For the record, I've been tempted to blog several times, but upon thinking it over a bit more it felt like I'd been gone too long and I didn't know how to jump back in. But, here I went, and I'm looking forward to more.

Oh, the chaos.

2010-12-10T11:52:00.000+01:00

This is what our apartment looked like yesterday, and for the past four days before that. Now the table is still junky (maybe more so?) but the boxes are gone. Where? We have no real idea, and I said it will be my Christmas miracle if they actually do arrive where they're supposed to in any length of time. So, it's just us and a few random pieces of standard IKEA fare in our apartment. Waiting for D-Day. D is for Departure.

We hosted a little goodbye/housecooling party last weekend, encouraging our guests to help themselves to a pile of stuff we would be leaving behind. About half went, and the other half dissappeared along with our couch in a truck manned by two nice foreigners and one burly Swede who I decided is an ex-criminal, based on the mission's website.

Tuesday I had a final lunch with my friend Shirin who served up homecooked Indian fare. Delicious. On the way home Elijah passed out in his stroller (something he's doing more and more of these days as he's so bundled when we go out that he can hardly move) and on a whim I stopped in a salon for a GREATLY-NEEDED haircut.

Elijah slept almost the whole time, waking up just as my stylist put the finishing touches on framing my face. I got to enlighten her about the concept of no-pooing, she seemed quite interested. I think I had about three inches cut off, and it feels so much shorter when I run my hands through it. But really, it's still on the longer end of what I'm used to.

I'm exhausted today, and not just from packing and cleaning. For the last few Thursday nights I've been attending an on-line class taught by Canadian midwife Gloria Lemay. She teaches at 7pm Pacific time... this is 4am my time, so I dutifully ask Keith to set the alarm for 3:45 so that I can nurse Elijah back to sleep (he inevitably stirs just before I need to get up) and then pad my way into the living room where I've set up my computer, earphones and notebook a few hours before. I'm loving it and it's totally worth it, but come Friday I'm a bit wasted.

More later, hopefully. Now I'm off to a sushi lunch.

Gratituding: Husband Edition

2010-12-01T13:56:00.000+01:00

Yesterday was a particularly difficult day for Elijah as he's about to receive a few more teeth. We spent most of the day cuddled together and nursing. We were about to go out to our last Baby Rhythmic class, but at the last minute I decided it wasn't worth the breakdown it was causing, especially with the temperature in the negatives (F) / teens (C). Right now it's -11C by the way, which is freaking cold. All this to say, I was particularly thankful for my husband, who not only brought home Thai food for dinner, but also came home instead of of staying straight through until late to finish his last experiment, which meant that he then had to go back out into the freezing temps for one more round-trip at 9pm. Gosh, I really hate experiments.
Other reasons I'm so thankful for Keith: He's pretty much single-handedly navigated the mortgage process (stressful) and our mortgage broker (super-stressful). He's arranged the crate shipping of our belongings from here to there. He desires to be a Navy SEAL, not so much literally (thank goodness) but in spirit. He's in love with Elijah and is such an awesome dad; I love watching them in action together. He is so generous. I could go on and on but there's a baby that needs me; I'll end by saying I'm thankful he's so good-looking.

friends... I like 'em

2010-11-29T16:39:00.000+01:00

In the spirit of Thanksgiving and Advent - and wanting to stave off the impending stress of moving - I thought I'd do a little gratituding here on ye ol' blog this week. Feel free to join in in the comments or link to your own blog.

I am thankful for friends that travel ten hours (each way) to celebrate a shared holiday. I am thankful for friends with wheels that put forth endless offers of transport and help. I am thankful for friends that throw deliciously warm and deliciously delicious fikas to celebrate Advent. I am thankful for friends that send letters in the mail. I am thankful for friends that are a constant source if encouragement and support. I am thankful for friends with whom to share confidantly (and who appreciate my word inventions). I am thankful for friends that have gone first (marriage, kids, living abroad, buying a house, etc cetera and ad naseum) and share their knowledge. I am thankful for friends that love my baby. I am thankful for friends that laugh at my jokes. I am thankful for friends that inspire me, in action and in thought. I am thankful for friends that share their talents with me.

Thanksgiving 2010

2010-11-25T14:40:00.000+01:00

Our Thanksgiving motto this year:

"The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!" (Henry Ward Beecher)

Things I'm thankful for right now:
Family located all throughout the US (not to mention here with me in Sweden), some that are soon to be almost-neighbors
Friends located throughout the world; old ones, new ones, soon-to-be ones
Huge strollers that plow through the snow and carry everything from baby to groceries
A clean apartment (relatively, anyway) in which to live and welcome guests
A new house waiting for us stateside, made possible through much hard work and miniscule interest rates
A co-chef for Thanksgiving that loves to cook as much as I do, and also once served as my co-chef when we decided we could cater a wedding (never again! but it was fun)
The internets that - while sometimes, admittedly, serves a thorn in my side - on a good day provides me with insights, new ideas, new friends, recipes, an outlet for thoughts, inspiration, motivation, and good old fashioned 'know-how'

Happy Thanksgiving to you. Be thankful, eat lots, and stay the heck away from Black Friday.

In the Air

2010-11-23T19:37:00.000+01:00

What's in the air today?

Snow. I knew something was up during the night because the light that shines in behind our curtains was glowing, not dark as usual. When Keith got up I said, "did it snow?" And he looked out the window and said "yup." Talk about ESP/reading-the-context. !!!

Cold. Maybe you think this is obvious. But sometimes the air around the snow is almost warm, at least compared to what you'd expect. Today, though, the temperature isn't just cold, it's bone-chilling. Gothenburg Air can be like that.

Excitement. There's a lot going on around these parts, you know! We're getting ready to move, and I'm checking things off the list one-by-one-by-one. Plus, it's Thanksgiving this week and we're celebrating with our friends on Friday (one couple in from Bristol). One of them is even a real, red-blooded American! The holiday parties start this weekend, coinciding with Advent, and then it's pretty much non-stop until we go.

Water. Elijah and I both woke up with dry throats, so I've been simmering a big pot of water on the stove all day. (Except when we were out. Otherwise, Danger!) Hopefully we'll all sleep better tonight.

Christmas Music. I'm using Spotify to listen to old and new favorites. Mariah Carey's new album does not get to stay on my list; however, there's one song where she goes all opera on us (or, maybe it's her opera-singing mother?) and when Elijah hears it he screeches way up high. Cute.

What's in your air today?

a post in which i talk about my hair.

2010-11-21T11:51:00.000+01:00

I am not one that typically gives a lot of thought to my hair. I remember being five or so and going to get a haircut and the lady asked me how often I brushed. I told her once a week, and she politely encouraged me to try every day.

In middle and high school I would get a hair cut once, maybe twice, a year. (And no, this wasn't because my parents didn't want to more regularly pony up the $12 +tip for a trip to the local Hair Cuttery [my venue of choice].) I still refrained from regular brushing, but for the most part it looked just fine with my fingers run through it.

**Tangent: I"m imagining a movie called "A Finger Runs Through It." It would have Brad Pitt in it and he would have a really flowy head of blond curls and he would spend hours running one finger through his hair. And, fly-fishing.**

Once I moved to Boston, I decided that I'd earned the right to nice hair cuts, and started going to Biyoshi every 4-6 months. This sparked an on-again/off-again love affair with a hair straightener, especially when my hair was trimmed to my chin. And, I admit that I LOVED my hair whenever I walked out of Biyoshi. (I still go there whenever I'm in town and I have time.)

These days, my hair is longer than its ever been, down to the middle of my back. If you've seen pictures of me recently you probably can't tell because I usually keep it secured away from a certan set of sticky fingers and gummy mouth by the permatail coming out the top of my head. While I like having long hair in theory, in practice it is a bit difficult for me... seems a lot harder to keep looking decent with minimal effort, it's a bigger pain to wash/comb/air-dry. Also, I don't know what my deal is, but only in recent months have I started the postpartum hair shed, and with long hair it is... well, just wild! I didn't know one could lose so much hair and not appear bald! And yet, hear I am.

Recently I started on a little hairventure. I kept coming across bloggers that had switched to [wait for it]... "NO-POO." No shampoo, just a mix of baking soda and water, with the eventual possibility of weaning off even that completely in exchange for only water. I was intrigued by the testimonies from seemingly normal people, many of whom posted their results which appeared satisfactory. I also loved the idea of less chemicals and less things to buy, so I gave it a shot. In all honesty, I was really only washing my hair about twice a week anyway these days (and yes, same goes for showering. Sue me.) so I didn't think it would be that big of a deal to switch. I was mostly right. I'm still in what one might call the transition phase (apparently this can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months), but it's not too bad, actually. I do comb my hair now every day - a requirement with the length, as I was waking up with, oh how would you say... 'nests' on the back of my head.

In the back of my mind I am considering dreadlocks. I think this mane would dread right up with minimal effort, and what's easier to maintain than dreadlocks? (Baldness, but I'm not going there.) I've always sort of wanted to be a hippy, earthy, crunchy individual, and dreadlocks would pretty much lock that persona in.

Anyway, if you're interested in reading more about no-poo (yes, yes, we can all agree that's a terrible name for it), check out this link from Simple Mom, and see the extensive links at the bottom of her post.

Using My Voice Within Social Media

2010-11-18T10:36:00.004+01:00

Facebook [insert any social forum] is a hard place to be sometimes. Okay, a lot of times. So often I want to throw up my hands, delete my account, and only exist in the real world. Other times, I want to use Facebook as my sounding board, my soap box, mt fifteen minutes of fame. Usually, I exist somewhere in between; complacent.

I'm at that stage where so many people I am acquainted with are having babies, raising babies, having more babies. Sometimes these interactive mediums are great because I learn so much about what works, about what to look forward to, or just find a similar soul to commiserate or celebrate with. Other times, I read things that make my stomach cringe and my heart hurt for the people out there that are hurting- either themselves, or their babies.

I believe that my voice is powerful, and I believe that I am meant to be an advocate. I also believe that just because I think this, doesn't mean others will receive my anointing with a resounding ovation.

And so, I am attempting to walk a fine line between asserting myself as a know-it-all (because I am so very, very far from actually knowing it all), a knows-what's-best-for-you voice (because, honestly, I don't - Instinctual Parenting, remember?), and just standing silent in the corner as the world happens as it will; hands-off, if you will.

Did you know Sweden, claiming to stay neutral during WWII, allowed the Nazis to travel across its soil so as to invade Norway? I don't want to be that kind of neutral.

And so, I am trying, trying, to learn to use my voice in a way that only empowers, doesn't shame. This is so difficult a task that if I am successful I should be more popular than Obama (although, I should definitely take a few pointers from him along the way). It is so easy for me to recognize why I don't like/agree with/support something, but isn't that easy for everyone? The masterpiece is persuasion. The crowning jewel in communication is to build a team, to build camaraderie, a sense of cohesion among the disjoints.

Here are my personal guidelines so far that seem to be helping me get from A to B:
Externally, to the other person:
Acknowledge the primary problem/emotion/factor as valid: "That is so hard!".
Talk from personal experience: "This is what worked for me...".
Be supportive: "Good luck! I hope this works out for you."
Offer to provide additional support, if appropriate: "I can track down those resources if you'd like."

Internally, to myself:
Remind myself that I don't have all the information. Remind myself that 99% of the time everyone involved is doing the very best they know how. Prepare for, and recognize when, my input is not needed [wanted]. And then, emotionally walk away. For every conversation that leaves me deflated, there are five others that leave me encouraged and lifted and are a sign that my desires are valuable. If I spend hours mourning the parenting/birth/pregnancy/etc... experience for others, my own well-being and parenting will suffer and then I've accomplished less than nothing. I've become Sweden. (And in this rare case, I do not desire to be Sweden.)

Thanks for reading... this has been cathartic!

Eleven Months

2010-11-16T09:58:00.003+01:00

How can it be that another month has passed, that we are only one more month away from a first birthday? I read recently that with kids each year goes by twice as fast as the last and I am dreading this truth already.

Elijah's diet consists mostly of bananas and breast milk. In fact, his true parentage is being revealed: He's half banana. Yesterday he had two. Did you know that if you gently massage a banana it naturally separates into three parts? If you break one of those three parts into pieces then it produces perfectly sized toddler bites. Often, Elijah will resist the first bite of food (banana or otherwise) but if we can just stuff a little bit in his mouth then the curtain raises and he's in love. We're branching out into lots of other foods too, often sharing what's on our plates or in our bowls. He was even a fan of the spicy coconut lentil soup I made the other week.

Elijah has stuck to taking his steps only here and there. I figure he knows that at this point crawling is still faster. But when he does take those steps he is deliciously happy with himself and his face lights up (as do ours). Perhaps correspondingly, he has almost overnight come down with a bout of separation anxiety, being quite content to crawl into our laps and cuddle (and sometimes shrieking contempt when we put him down). But, what can I say, I like to be needed so I don't really mind. In the mornings he is particularly wanting of only me, which puts just a little bit of a damper on my sleep-in time. But he's also just so darn cute when he wakes up, sitting up between us with a grin, and we never know who's eyes he will try to maul out first.

His sounds are becoming more and more word-like, and he's got a knack for imitation. The other day as Keith walked out the door I called "Bye, dad!" and I swear Elijah mimicked back with "Bye dah!" He also imitates the 'grrrr' of the stick blender and the different pitches of our voices. I also occasionally think I hear a "hej!" or "hejhej!", the Swedish "hi" and "bye". Of course, if I listened hard enough I could probably hear him recite the Gettysburg Address.

In mom and dad news, we've had a few bad parenting moments... trying to clear up his chest rash with more natural remedies until it became almost full-body (the low-dose cortisone from the doc cleared it up in about five seconds); the ingestion of a tea bag staple; leaving drawers and doors in the perfect position to finger-crunch. Thank goodness we have a few more years until Elijah discovers our complete inadequacy... for now he just looks at us with googly eyes and giggles.

Instinctual Parenting

2010-11-11T11:23:00.004+01:00

**UDATED to add: Here's another great post that touches on this subject. (Check out the whole blog, too!)**

Ironically, as I was mulling over the writing of this post in my head, this post was waiting for me in my Google Reader. I encourage you to read it for more of the same of what I've written below.

Parenting is not always easy, always fun, always obvious. But it is instinctual (when we let it be). I recently corresponded with a a friend who was having trouble with her newborn. She had been desperately seeking help, and wrote this:

"I have that mother's instinct that something just is not right [...]. It is hard (especially with your first) to explain to the doctor what your concerns are because I feel like sometimes they treat me as the "first time mom" that doesnt understand that babies cry and need to mature. I get that, but I also spend the most time with him and I know something just isnt right."

Another friend has reflected on how the "experts" (including an IBCLC) tried to convince her that her milk supply wasn't adequate and never would be as she tried to nurse her newborn. She didn't listen to them.

In both these instances, my friends were right.

This morning in one of my on-line forums for moms, a young mom posted a question about how to transition her daughter out of her bed. But, before she asked for help, she spent a paragraph beating herself up for letting her daughter get used to sleeping with her, how she knew all the risks, and blamed her decision to co-sleep anyway on being a young, dumb mom. Only after she ascertained herself as the resident idiot did she then ask for help.

As I read her post, my instincts shouted NO! What you are doing is not crazy, it is not bad. You brought your baby into bed with you for a reason, for which co-sleeping provided an actual solution! Why is trusting your instinct bad?

With so many things, I feel like we are always looking to the experts for the answers, when really we have the answers in our souls.

With my friends that are becoming moms, I sometimes really struggle with giving advice. I long to encourage them away from things and towards the pragmatic. No, you don't need 87 things for the baby to sit in when you have two arms. No, you don't need all those toys when you have a kitchen filled with fun utensils to explore. And on and on. On the flip side, I also really hate being "that mom" who thinks she knows everything because I have a kid (or I've given birth or I've breastfed or...). What I realized this morning is that what I'm really wanting to do is encourage my friends (and be encouraged, myself) back towards trusting our instincts.

I had another interaction with an expectant mom about the moral failings of popular but often detrimental parenting philosophy. I really encouraged this friend to steer clear of its message of Parents Good, Babies Bad and overscheduling. While I think all my points were very valid and I still cringe whenever I think of anyone inflicting these flawed concepts onto their poor innocent child, what I wish I had simply said was "follow your instincts!" My friend is not a dogmatic, rigid person. She is loving and empathetic and - as with lots of parents - most likely many of her pre-conceived notions of "things I'll always/never do as a parent" went out the window the second she laid eyes on her beautiful baby and she gave way to the massive love flood that physically overtakes a new parent.

I think back to centuries ago (even one century ago?), when women gave birth in the company of other women. They didn't need to hire a doula, interview midwives, take a Bradley class. They simply absorbed and observed the practicalities and wisdom of the feminine experiences around them and listened to their own bodies. I think in particular of this ridiculous notion of needing a doctor to tell you when to push in labor (or, even more ridiculous, having to wait to push until the doctor is there). If you've given birth vaginally and without an epidural, you know very well that your body SCREAMS at you that it's ready to push.

Why have we left instincts in our ancestral dust? Who decided that it would be a beneficial idea to not listen to our bodies, ignore our babies' cries, to say no (to breastfeeding on cue, sleeping together, moving during labor, physical touch, etc...) when we are dying to say yes? Often I read of a parent that is trying to get their kid to sleep using the Cry It Out (CIO) method, and they say "I am crying as much as she is!" or "This breaks my heart!" Then why the heck are you doing that? Are our visceral reactions fooling us? It's like advocating that "no" means "yes" and it's ludicrous.

So, here's my future advice to new moms and dads - forget the experts. YOU are now the expert. You aren't stupid and neither is your kid. No one knows your kid better than you - not your pediatrician, not your OB/GYN, not your midwife, not your best friend, not even your mom. Sure, they can all offer nuggets of experience, draw on generalities. But your kid is your kid, On the flip side, it's time for us parents to rise to the occasion. Take the time to really KNOW your child. Turn off the laptop. Learn to listen to your body, your intuition. Follow those instincts, and have faith in them. Sure, they might not be spot-on 100% of the time, but neither is your doctor. Don't make illogical decisions ("his father is circumcised so he should be, too") but contemplate what's in front of you ("why was he born with a foreskin anyway?"). Question the "norm" anytime it goes against your gut.

Finally, here's a little snapshot from our parenting story: Elijah falls asleep at night and for naps either with me nursing him or Keith wearing him in the ERGO. At times we both have the thought, "Man, wouldn't it just be great if Elijah could put himself to sleep... we could just lay him down, walk out, and be done with it!" And you know what? It would be great, and I know that one day Elijah will do just that. But Keith made the observation the other night that it is actually really nice that we have this little window of time with him each night (and each nap) to really connect, to hear all his babbles, to feel his body go soft and limp against ours, to leave the room knowing that he is in a peaceful slumber. Looking at it numbers-wise, I would say it's about an extra 45 minutes to an hour per day that one of us is spending with him in those quiet pre-sleep moments. Leaving him never "felt right" to me when he was such a tiny helpless baby, and the fact that this has become our habit (a "bad habit" according to one pediatrician we saw - thanks, but I wasn't asking for opinions!) through conscious choice makes me happy.

The End. (But also, hopefully, The Beginning.)

Firsts

2010-11-09T15:19:00.001+01:00

First snow today. Lots of blustery wind to keep it moving sideways into our eyes for good measure.

Oh yes, and Elijah is officially walking. He's taken a few steps here and there over the last week or two, but today is his day.

Labor Encouragements

2010-11-06T18:40:00.002+01:00

As I type this, I've got a dear friend of mine who is waiting to birth her baby. How exciting! Got any encouragements for a mama in labor? Leave them here in the comments - I know she'll appreciate them!

past anticipation

2010-11-01T10:32:00.003+01:00

In attempting to clean out my hard drive this morning I discovered this journal from almost a year ago (the very end of November). As i re-read it I could still really identify with the anticipation with which it was written. As fall and winter find their way to Gothenburg, I am remembering so clearly what last fall was like... lumbering around with my huge stomach, remembering certain outfits I wore to specific events, waiting for our life to be turned upside-down by another being... you get the idea. Here's the journal:

My due date is six days away, and I am so focused on when and how this birth will start. Each night I go to bed thinking, “It has to be tonight!”, only to wake up in the morning – still pregnant – to redertmine to myself that “Today is definitely the day!” Clearly, my powers of persuasion have not taken root like my cognitive imagination has; and so, I wait.

But thrown in here now and again are these thoughts of, well, almost of loss. I think, “Today could be the last time I wear my maternity clothes”, or “today could be the last time I feel my baby move from the inside of my body” or even, “today could be the last time that I really love and enjoy my body for a while” (although I hope this last one will not be true, that I will love my new shape immediately, and love and cherish the reasons for why it has taken on new shapes and feels).

And then, part of me just needs to stop, to reflect, to absorb all that has, is, and will happen within a very short period of time. I certainly plan on more kids, more births, to experience all these things again. But, I will never experience them again for the first time. I am pretty sure that I will never take in all these events with the same clarity, the same awe, reverence, incredulity with which they are striking me now. I don't want to lose these precious moments, these precious first moments with my child.

So, Baby, I just want to say, thank you. It's been such a pleasure to experience all these firsts with you. You will always be my first, and there is a sweetness that comes with that. You have taught me what “being pregnant” is about, what it is like. You have already brought me so much pleasure and joy, from the first time you enabled me to turn that second line blue; from your first movements that I could feel, and then that your dad could feel; from all the symptoms I had that gave me an excuse to rest and take care of us with reckless abandon.

And Baby, know that while I mourn – in some small ways – you leaving my body, it is just because I am selfish, and I want to keep you inside for myself so that I can continue to exclusively bask in the pleasures of knowing you. But at the same time I am so very, very excited to meet you on the outside, to see you, to know your gender, to know who you look like like, to see you grow and develop into all that you are, and to share you with everyone that is so excited to meet you.

We have so many things to experience together in the near future, things that I am also so excited to encounter: our first Christmas as a family; our first family snuggle; our first feeding; watching you root around on my chest, with hunger in your eyes (you get this from me); watching you and daddy together (you already know his voice and touch so well, I think); and so much more.

We are ready for you. We love you. I will wait until you are ready, just know that we are ready when you are.

thursday thoughts

2010-10-28T21:03:00.005+02:00

It's been a really quiet week around here. Elijah and I were sick in the beginning of the week and we've since infected Keith. So, we've been staying at home a lot and I used that as an opportunity to teach Elijah about Pajama Days. I'm glad I dragged myself to the grocery store on Monday even though I felt my sore throat coming on with startling speeds because it means that we've been well-stocked with lots of fruits, veggies, and tea. And chocolate.

Yeah, my plan to abstain from chocolate for a month didn't really take root... I'll try again later, but I'd like to think I've developed a more... appropriate relationship with my smooth-talking friend.

I've been sorting and organizing things, trying to pare down what we intend to bring back to the States with us. Part of it is my desperate desire to avoid dealing with a shipping company. Every time I find one that seems like a possibility I'll then check out reviews from previous customers. They are horrible! Every company has a fair number of outrageously bad reviews and I'd rather strip down to the skivvies of our belongings than have frustrating dealings with a company starting now and ending when we receive our broken, molding junk a year from now. That said, if anyone out there has an international moving company to recommend, let me know!

I've been enjoying yoga lately. For my shower gift, my dear friend Mary - a certified toga instructor - put together a personalized yoga dvd for me to help me get in shape after birth. It's part of my repertoire and I find myself coming back to it every couple months. I've mostly loved the stretching section, I guess because I'm likely to use it when I've been lazy and not done anything for a long time, and the stretching she's put together feels SO VERY DELICIOUS on my muscles. I tend to avoid the strength section because, quite frankly, it has intimidated me, but today I was like, girlfriend! Do me some plank pose! And I did, and it was great. Elijah loves to climb all over me while I'm pretzel-like, which is fun. It's not fun when he tries to pull my ponytail and then I yell out in pain. Isn't it against zen law to yell while doing yoga?

A lot of yoga studios offer special deals for first-time customers, a veritable, unlimited, yoga buffet for, say, $50 a month. Depending on what - if any - gym options Keith and I decide on, I might try out some yoga studios in our new 'hood. Several of my friends are totally hooked on it. I've done it here and there (usually with one of those friends) and enjoy it. However, being one who thrives on instant gratification, I usually gravitate towards a heart-pumping workout where the sweat signals accomplishment, versus yoga where mastering a position can take months or years. That said, the discipline would be good for me... (See paragraph re: chocolate.)

I'm starting to think about what I want to plant in my garden next spring. I mean produce-wise. I've never done this before, and I don't remember exactly how much space I have, but this is what I'm thinking: sweet potatoes; chard; kale; spinach; tomatoes; herbs. What else? Hot peppers? bush beans? I like things that are high-yielding and then things that will either store well or that I can do something with to preserve. I don't know about canning, does that strip out the nutrients? But I can dehydrate stuff, like make my own sun-dried tomatoes. I've read references to freezing greens (for smoothies) but can't imagine how that would actually work... Other ideas?

And sigh...

That's all for tonight.

recent food havings

2010-10-26T20:01:00.007+02:00

We've enjoyed some really great partly-raw meals lately that go hand in hand with our chilly weather. It's almost like fall got skipped over and we're enjoying the step-sister of fall and winter, Ms. Finter Wall. All that to say, Chilly!

First up is tonight's installment of Beans 'n' Greens. I went with kidney beans yesterday at the store, and used them in this recipe that I discovered as I searched for a sweet potato stew. It was great and felt really soothing on my sore throat (colds suck, BTW). I used a fresh red chili instead of the cayenne and, following a tip from a comment below the recipe, used some cornstarch to thicken the liquid. It was fabulous.

Along side it I made a raw kale salad massaged with pumpkin oil (a delicious gift from a friend's trip to Vienna) and balsamic and salt, and topped with diced butternut squash sauteed in coconut oil and salt. Lots of salt. Delicious.

In a similar vein to the greens and squash dish, last Friday I whipped up this quick soup, when Keith came through the door having already eaten and I was famished (oh, silly little Ms. Communication!):

It was AMAZING. The base is lentils and butternut squash, with lots of kale tossed in after I took it off the heat. Again, I topped it with sauteed butternut, and mango. It was so random that it totally rocked my socks off, like argyle and plaid on a Private School Kid. I think I added some chili flakes as well? Gosh, Friday was so long ago, wasn't it?

This little number might look familiar, but it's not:

This is a totally different butternut squash soup, which has about as much roasted onion in it as it does squash. That's a raw kale salad with a raw cashew alfredo sauce pulling double-duty as a dressing (I think? or, maybe it's the Brazil nut pate - either way is delicious!), with some sprouted wheat/almond/date bread (not homemade, unfortunately, I haven't tried my hand at raw breads yet) for soup dipping.

And finally, a raw marinara sauce that's delicious:

Up close it totally looks like a bolognese sauce. I was planning to serve this with raw noodles (shaved carrots and zucchini) but the cool day demanded some authentic comfort so I settled for a [mostly] whole wheat pasta mix with greens (eating it all mixed together was definitely the way to go). Delicious!

Tonight I'm trying my hand at a new raw dish, something I should have tried much earlier on. My lack of a dehydrator tricks me into excluding myself from a whole chapter of raw foods, but my oven will do just fine, remember?

As I write, my flax seed play-doh is being transformed into a sheet of cracker. Just another 12 hours to go and we'll be in business! Just kidding, it won't take that long; I just wish it would so I wouldn't have to get up in the middle of the night to rescue it. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Beans 'n' Greens

2010-10-20T09:11:00.004+02:00

I'm revisiting the idea of a weekly meal plan in an attempt to cut down on time spent contemplating what to come up with for dinner (20 minutes before I want to be sitting down to eat) and to make Keith's lunches for work easy-peasy and less reliant on the baguette bar across from his office.

One of my favorite weekly staples is Beans 'n' Greens. Usually this is served in the beginning of the week, so that we have the rest of the week to work through the big pot of beans I make. I'll put the beans in a pot to soak in the morning, and then by 5pm or so they're ready to be cooked. Then, I'll take whatever hearty greens I have (usually kale these days) and serve them either together in the same dish or along-side them in a different way.

Last week I made a big pot of giant white beans (so, so good), and then sauteed them with garlic and kale. Yesterday I made a big batch of chick peas, and served the chick peas tossed with olive oil and balsamic vinegar and salt (a most delicious, easy meal by itself) and then sauteed two bunches of dinosaur kale, two eggplants, and a bunch of garlic together, tossed in some sesame seeds and topped with chili flakes. Voilà!

Remnants of last night's greens

You'll obviously observe that this meal isn't at all raw, but I do take care not to cook the heck out of the greens, and do more of a gentle braising, if you will. Another thing that I've been doing a lot, however, is raw kale salads which I'm loving.

The leftover beans go into the fridge to be used in salads, for snacking, or for Elijah. If by the weekend they aren't gone, I'd probably do another sauteed dish with more greens and, of course, more garlic.

Ten Months

2010-10-17T21:27:00.002+02:00

Elijah is ten months old now, and I can barely stand it. But he can - he's standing for longer and longer stints, completely on his own, and is just getting into the groove of walking around the apartment while firmly attached to our fingers. I know that one day in the not too distant future he'll see some lotion bottle from across the room and decide the best way to get there is by using two limbs instead of four. The kid loves those lotion bottles! I finally cleaned out a near-empty one so that he could have exclusive rights to it, instead of Keith or me constantly monitoring his daily intake of lotions.

Elijah babbles and babbles and babbles and seems to be talking to all sorts of people that we can't see. The other morning when he woke up he looked at Keith and said, "daddy!" which melted my heart even though I was still 87% asleep. At night as I rock and nurse him to sleep, he usually reaches a point where he's sighing a lot and sharing sleepy mutterings aloud. I interpret this as his decompression from the day, getting everything out that he's taken in from dawn till dusk. It's very uninhibited and so precious, I wish he would do that forever.

I thought he might have been giving up one of his naps the other week, but after a little tossing and turning it seems that he's settled on keeping both naps but making them shorter (about one hour each) and spacing them out a bit more. So now a typical day will start around 6:30 with a nap at 10, another at 3, and bed around 7. His night sleep is feeling more solid as well, and it's becoming more rare that I'll need to go in and re-settle him after putting him to bed before we come to bed several hours later. Apart from a few nights last week where he apparently thought the best hour of the day was from 3:30 am to 4:30 am, he stirring far less at night, meaning that I'm not nursing him as much at night these days. However, as we've progressed from purees to finger foods it seems like his solid food intake has gone down and he's actually nursing more during the day.

Elijah is getting very into feeding himself with a spoon. Of course he's not as efficient as we are at feeding him, but he totally gets that first you touch the spoon to the food, then you bring it to your lips. Sometimes we'll play-eat together (without real food involved) and he loves this!

Elijah loves playing Peek-a-boo, or Tittut! (in swedish). Sometimes I'll throw a cloth over his head and say, "Where's Elijah?" and he'll grab the cloth from his head and produce a huge smile. Other times he'll pick up a cloth and cover his face on his own, or duck behind a wall or a chair and do the hiding on his own.

At the park Elijah can climb up the steps on the ladybug slide and then glide down gleefully. When Keith comes home at night they will often spend some time climbing up the steps that are just outside our door.

In conclusion: Elijah loves people, hates having his face wiped, and brings so much joy to us that it almost hurts. In a good way.

Giveaway Winners

2010-10-09T16:01:00.002+02:00

I can't decide if this is the lamest or awesome-est giveaway ever. On the Awesome hand, I feel a little like Oprah, who gets to give every single audience member a new Prius. On the Lame hand, this is the only Oprah audience in history to have only two audience members.

Lame or Awesome, I am still very excited to be able to give away two copies of Ina May's Guide to Childbirth with the help of my friend Jane. I am also excited because both of these women are nurses (I think), and should they ever find themselves working on L&D, I hope this book will empower them to empower their patients in new ways. Carolyn and Meridith, email me your mailing address at kateisfun [at] gmail [dot] com and those books will be on their way.

a lovely day.

2010-10-07T22:27:00.003+02:00

Today was a lovely, easy-going day. Elijah and I walked to the park, where he swung in the swing and chased the ducks and played in the wet sand while wearing rubber pants. Then, we met my friend for lunch, and enjoyed a soup and CAKE buffet. Definitely not raw, but WHO CARES?! Delicious. Elijah surprised me by taking two great naps, sandwiching our lovely outing. While he slept I read this article, and then emailed back and forth with the author who took the time to personally respond to my comment. (If you feel so inclined, do the same so as to encourage NPR to support more coverage of women's health and childbirth issues.) My lovely friend Jane emailed me and also wants to add a copy of Ina May's Guide to Childbirth to the giveaway I posted yesterday, so go to that post and leave a comment (unless, of course, you want Lone Commenter Carolyn to win both copies...). That's all, enjoy your evening!

Giveaway Fun

2010-10-06T09:50:00.004+02:00

A couple days ago I won a giveaway over at cjanerun. I was so very, very excited. First of all, who doesn't love to win things? Not me. As in, I don't not love to win things. Got it? Second of all, what I won wasn't dumb. It's awesome! It's a collection of hymns sung in a hip, artsy-fartsy way, and who doesn't love hymns sung in artsy-fartsy ways? I don't! (I'm not explaining that this time.)

For a preview of what I'm getting, check this out:

Also, I won because I left a comment in the giveaway post. As I was writing it I knew I was going to win. Here it is:

" kateisfun said...
I'm also in Sweden! But that's not why I should win. I should win because the sound of this music revives my soul, makes me smile, and doesn't let me keep my mouth shut."

Doesn't that just SCREAM "give this woman a cd!"?

I'm thinking that proper blogging netiquette indicates that I should now host my own giveaway as a "pay it forward" kind of deal. But honestly, I don't know what to give away... my half-used bag of chia seeds? Elijah's toothbrush? My doula services? I'll have to contemplate this for a bit...

...

Got it! So, I've been thinking that I would love to be able to provide every pregnant woman who wants one a copy of Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (much like peaceful parenting does with its circumcision information packets). This book provides so much incredible information about what a woman and her body are capable of during birth, and this book has been a game-changer for many of its readers. I'm not quite able to start sending these books out by the case (yet), but I can certainly give away one.

To enter my giveaway, leave a comment about why you'd like this book. The winner will be chosen by asking my husband to choose a random number between 1 and X. Happy Commenting! (Commenting will close Friday night at midnight, EST.)

Wanted: Inspiration & Chocolate

2010-10-05T09:58:00.003+02:00

Sometimes I really want to blog, but then I sit down to do it and immediately I feel stuck. That would be today, and most days over the past week. Add a little Elijah into the mix, and as soon as I get an inkling of inspiration my attention is requested elsewhere. For now, however, he's sleeping peacefully, wrapped cozily in the huge fleece blanket that IKEA gave us for free (probably because of the big black strip across the bottom of it, indicating, no doubt that this was the last of the fabric on the dart). I'm having a little faith here that inspiration will find its way to my fingertips in a timely fashion.

I decided to stop eating chocolate for the month of October. My previously mentioned obsession with Urtekram milk chocolate was getting a little out of control, and I realized that it doesn't matter how much raw food one eats if 25% of her caloric intake is fueled by a candy bar. Even if it's organic, even if it's fair-trade. And so, the 30-day chocolate fast is meant to push the reset button in hopes that in 31 days I can come back and have an appropriate, non-co-dependent relationship with the lover of my taste buds.

Unfortunately, yesterday Elijah and I were having a fika play date with the moms from our BVC group, and I devoured a chocolate cake roll without even realizing it was chocolate. I don't really feel that bad about it because A) I did not exhibit malicious intent in doing so and B) it didn't knock my socks off, causing me to lust after more and more and more.

And, Elijah's up, so I'm off. Hopefully more inspiration will be found later!

The Elijah Corner

2010-09-30T14:49:00.003+02:00

There were several reasons to organize an Elijah Corner. The main one was that if Elijah was going to throw everything off of these two his-height shelves anyway, it might as well be his own stuff. (The things of ours that were there, insignificant items like files and CDs, have been relegated to the top shelves.) The secondary reason is that it contains his toys to this one area (mostly), instead of being in the middle of the living room and finding its way into the kitchen area, hallway, and beyond. Also, I thought that Elijah might find it overstimulating to have all his toys and books on the floor all at once (like they were), but in this set-up there's a place for each thing and it's really easy to clean up at the end of the day. Or, three times a day. Or, every five minutes.

We've succeeded in hiding all the other electrical cords from him, but there's one that we missed in the back left corner - see it? Elijah still hasn't found it which I'm surprised by since he usually seems to have a sixth sense about all things electricity.

Food Far & Near

2010-09-28T20:25:00.003+02:00

While I didn't have my trusty hand blender with me in the States last week, I was within walking distance of Whole Foods. This helped greatly with keeping us at least within spitting distance of raw, as well as provided some new fun things for me to stock up on and bring back.

I didn't know what a collard green really looked like, but I'd read that they make great wraps. Here's my Best Western Bathroom Food Art utilizing my newfound prop:

I also picked up some hard-to-find things at Whole Foods that I've been wanting to try but haven't been able to locate in Gothenburg yet. I returned to Sweden with a big container of raw vegan protein powder (to help bulk up morning smoothies - especially for Keith, who is often ravenous by mid-morning), a bag of hemp protein powder, and a bag of chia seeds (BTW, they were cheaper at Whole Foods than on Amazon). I made this pudding with the seeds, which was an almost-substitute for my tapioca pudding cravings. (Remember those?) I also replenished my vanilla extract supply (still cannot for the life of me find real vanilla extract in Gothenburg!!), which should last me until we move back in [yikes!] 2 1/2 months.

This bread I actually brought to the US, packed away in my suitcase. It was delicious, and raw, made out of sprouted wheat, dates, and nuts. Here I'm about to enjoy with raw almond butter and banana. The other night Keith and I had it with guacamole and tomato.

I'm very excited that the house we are trying to buy has an amazing backyard organic garden, about 1/3 to 1/2 of which is currently devoted to produce. When we saw it, it was bursting at the seams with chard and other greens... can't wait to make a smoothie with fresh greens from the back yard!

What else, what else? Elijah has been inhaling his food lately. Yesterday I made him a lentil/carrot dish with tumeric and cinnamon. It took a little getting used to since it is chunkier and thicker than what he's been having, but by today's lunch he actually looked like he might be enjoying it a bit. I'm about out of my stash of frozen purees, and I think it's time to think up some thicker, more substantial meals... Any suggestions?

Back for the last time

2010-09-27T12:24:00.004+02:00

We returned a few days ago from our trip to the Chicago area, where Keith had some work commitments and where we were house-hunting. The process of buying a house is So. Dramatic. Observe!

these houses are all okay...

WE FOUND THE HOUSE OF OUR DREAMS!!!!!!!!!

someone else bid on our house and now we don't want it.

WE FOUND THE SECOND HOUSE OF OUR DREAMS AND IT TOTALLY TRUMPS THE FIRST HOUSE BY A MILLION!!

I know, let's make a really low offer that they won't accept!

Counter offer!
Counter offer!
Counter offer!
ACCEPT!

Mortgage?

Uh, those are really hard to get these days when you don't have a real job.

But we will have one of those!! We promise!

WELL. You can maybe someday perhaps get a mortgage if you can provide documentation of your first three play dates from childhood and predict the day you're mother-in-law's cat is going to die.

What if my mother-in-law doesn't have a cat?!?! We're Screwed!!

And so on and so forth, and that's what we're in the middle of now. But, we are really hopeful that this will work out in the end, but the ride to the end is cah-RAY-zee! Stay tuned for more on that front.

Jet lag on this end of the trip has hit me HARD. I'm sure it doesn't help that my mind is always racing with thoughts about our house and mortgage and all that stuff as well, but last night Keith and I went to bed at 11 and I literally could not sleep until three or four. Awful! I hate insomniactic nights. Of course, the more I thought about it the harder it was to drift off... not fun. I managed to get myself out of bed this morning a little after ten, but only because Elijah's head was going to start spinning and pop off his neck if I didn't provide some entertainment, pronto.

I will also say that flying with a nine-month old is certainly not as easy as flying with a three-month-old. Elijah did really well; Keith and I, less so. But, we survived.

It is very bittersweet that this is the last time that we will come back to Sweden with Sweden as our home. The countdown is beginning, for me at least, as I know the next 2 1/2 months are going to race by, especially if they are filled with the all-consuming tasks related to home buying. So, I am determined to carve out some time and space to really, truly enjoy what I love most about Gothenburg and store away all the Swedishisms my senses can handle.

Nine Months

2010-09-13T13:57:00.004+02:00

This week Elijah turns nine months old.
Nine months ago he looked like this:
I'm really glad he decided to come out.

We've been hitting up the baby food pretty hard the past couple weeks, getting my culinary inspirations from Smitten Kitchen. It's pretty good stuff, I admit... in fact, let's just go ahead and say we're all fans of the recipes.

In the mornings, sometimes Keith will come into the room to wake me up. Elijah will hear my voice in the living room, and come crawling into the bedroom and into my arms. He is getting more and more confident on his feet, and is getting more used to taking a few steps while holding onto our hands. He can reach things off the table top, which has made for some interesting moments.

I don't know how much he weighs exactly, but the kid is heavy! We've started using our stroller a lot more these days, which is definitely bittersweet... I miss having his little body close to mine all the time, being able to kiss his head any time I want. But, I do enjoy having full use of my back again, and Elijah is enjoying his new vantage point. I'm going to do some more research and find out what other babywearing parents of heavy babies do.

We've bought a pack 'n' play that sits next to our bed. Elijah still sleeps with us, but often for his naps or when he goes to sleep in the evenings (several hours before we do) I will attempt to put him down in it so that his love for electricity and All Things Dangerous doesn't get the better of him. This is also nice to have in the mornings when Elijah wakes up too early for Keith's sanity, and he can buy a few more minutes of sleep by plopping Elijah in there with some toys.

As far as I can tell, Elijah's favorite book is Dr. Seuss' Mr Brown Can Moo, Can You? (we have the abridged, board-book version) that my mom sent us (thanks, Nana!). I think he likes all the different sound effects, and we spend a good part of our days making all sorts of interesting noises. He also enjoys this great puzzle that Keith's mom brought us last January (thanks mamanae!), which has different animals that make sounds when the piece is put in or taken out (or, when the lights go on or off in the room... haven't figured that out quite yet...).

Elijah has just started waving and clapping. Last week these two actions were kind of mixed together, making for an awkward-yet-cute display of confusion. This week they've been separated, which has won the hearts of many-a-grandma that we encounter while waiting for the bus. I continue to be so amazed each time Elijah learns something new. Think about it... aside from children, most of the people we meet in our lives don't acquire new skills that make you go, "Oh, wow! That Bill sure can communicate better than he could last time we had dinner together!" But Elijah is definitely becoming more and more interactive which is so fun to watch.

Unfortunately, last week at BabyRhytmic, he became a little too interactive and tried to pull off Theodore's ears. Theodore didn't mind too much, but his dad seemed a little put off by it. This week, however, there was no ear pulling and no Theodore's dad. Problem solved!

Have Paper, Will Eat

2010-09-02T10:25:00.001+02:00

who you callin' turkey? Part Last

2010-08-28T22:31:00.000+02:00

16. Kekova
One afternoon we drove about 30 minutes away to the town of Kekova. It was very small and charming, and far less touristy than even Kas. (Kas is not overrun by any means, but certainly caters to tourists somewhat.) We walked along the docks and through the stalls of women selling their handmade goods. It was a delicious little trip.

17. Green Smoothies

I didn't actually put eggplant in the smoothies, but this is to represent all the AMAZING produce we had at our fingertips. We usually didn't have a real lunch, but instead would snack on fresh fruits and smoothies throughout the afternoon. It was a lot of work, though; I didn't have a big container to mix in, and we had to use bottled water to wash everything. I'm just glad I brought my stick blender with me.

18. Reading
The three of us read like it was going out of style. It was so luxurious to sit in the sun (or the shade) and read for hours. I read The China Study and finished up a novel I've taken with me on almost every trip for the last three years. (Can't say I enjoyed it too much.) Nikola doesn't quite get the same thrill we do from it, but he still got a kick out of us enjoying it so much.

So, that is our trip to Turkey, in a nutshell. Funny how most of our top 20 (Top 18, rather) have to do with food... just the way I like it.

who you callin' turkey? Part Five

2010-08-27T21:08:00.000+02:00

13. Keith's banana pancakes with Nutella

Do you really need an explanation?

14. The Russians
No picture, because that probably would have cost us our thumbs. Let's just say we had some interesting neighbors. We knew they were Russian when they erected their Russian flag in front of their villa. We think they brought a body guard and a housekeeper with them. We KNOW they brought hoards of guests and alcohol. We were just a little bit scared. I've said too much.

15. Iced Coffee
I love iced coffee. In fact, my love for coffee started one hot summer in Boston with Dunkin' Donuts' ginormous, sugar- and cream-laden iced coffees. I've refined my tastes (just a little milk now, thank you), but this version of Marija's was fabulous: Instant coffee, water, sugar, and milk (if you like) whirled with a stick blender, over ice. Voila! Delicious.

Because this post is a little short of pictures, I give you this: the sign for a hotel on our street. Gets the job done, no?

who you callin' turkey? Part Four

2010-08-26T21:58:00.000+02:00

10. Diving
Keith and Nikola brought their snorkel and diving gear and would go out every day, even multiple times. We're not talking oxygen tank diving, but doing some exploring 15-20 meters down. They even got a fishing trap and planted it in the sea in front of the villa, catching a few moray eels (which they threw back) and a couple fish (snapper?) that we enjoyed for dinner.

11. Fresh Almonds
I don't have a picture for this, but when we would walk through the town there would be old men with carts of fresh almonds, sitting on ice (the almonds, not the men). They were so huge and so good! You can rub them to take the skins off, but I loved them as-is (as-was?).

12. Elijah (and it wasn't even me who picked this one!)
What can I say, he's a keeper! Elijah loves his Auntie Marija and Uncle Nikola to bits, and the feeling appears to be mutual. Also, in Turkey everyone goes ga-ga over babies, particularly blond ones it would seem. There were a few instances - say, at Alper - where someone would take him from us and parade him around to their friends. (We'd been warned that this might happen!)

who you callin' turkey? Part Three

2010-08-25T21:41:00.000+02:00

7. Infinity pools (ours in particular)
Every villa around us had one. It looked like there was one pool builder in the whole area, and he came through and did his thing everywhere. No one seemed to be complaining.

8. 24 (seasons one and two)
So, Keith and I get into these modes of all-consuming veg out, where it takes all our will power to not watch just one more episode of a chosen series that we've not seen before (or, in the case of Arrested Development, that we have seen before). These times are almost exclusively limited to when we travel and our vice of choice this time was 24. Holy crap, how did I never watch this when it was originally airing?? This is like my favorite movie time EIGHT, for EIGHT SEASONS. I've still got anther six to get through, so maybe we'll be taking another super long vacation next summer, after all.

9. Watermelon

who you callin' turkey? Part Two

2010-08-24T21:20:00.000+02:00

The Turkey Top 20 continues:

4. Fresh-squeezed OJ
We started getting this at the bar at the hotel next to us, until we discovered that our own kitchen had an electric juicer and it was way cheaper and more fun to make our own. Once or twice a day we'd kick back with a glass and relax. Actually, we relaxed the whole time, but the juice didn't hurt.

5. Alper Restaurant
We went here at least four times, and loved the owner as much as the food. It's a family-run place headed up by Fatih, who makes the rounds and tells you you're like family after the first visit. The food comes from their organic garden, and my personal favorite was the meze plate for two (but for one, really) that I showed here.

6. Friday Market
Nikola and Marija discovered this when they were intending to go into town one Friday morning, and it's a total mecca of fresh produce, knock-off fashions, and handmade goods (like the wooden spoons I got for Elijah's play basket). The highlight for me was definitely the fresh fruits and veggies (okay... and the baklava); some stands were large and tended by whole families while other stands offered only a few zucchini and did little to hide the tiny old ladies crouched behind them. I loved buying directly from the producer.

who you callin' turkey?

2010-08-23T20:25:00.004+02:00

Before I forget (but how could I, really?), I need to write about Turkey. Over the next few days I'll be posting a series highlighting our top Turkey moments.

A little background:
We went to Turkey; it was awesome. Being our last summer in Europe for the forseeable future, we decided to do it up right and treat ourselves to an insanely long (by American standards) holiday with our friends, Marija and Nikola. Actually, we just high-jacked their already-planned holiday, but I don't think they minded. Right, guys? Guys?

In no particular order, here is the start of our Turkey Top 20:

1. Burek
Nikola and Marija, familiar with this from Serbian culture, introduced us to this right away. We had it in several forms, but basically it's bread and cheese (and sometimes parsley or meat) put together in such a way that you just can't stop eating it. Every morning we had the most wonderful breakfasts out on the patio, and more often than not burek was the centerpiece.

2. Baklava
Do you even understand what is happening in this picture? That is the most ginormous pan ever, filled with the homemade baklava that we bought at the Friday market. When we asked for it the second week, we had to wait a while. Finally, this young woman produced a giant jug of syrup, took the top off this pan, and LOADED it with sweet goodness. We wanted to buy three boxes of it, which seemed so far beyond her comprehension; we understood why when a local came up and bought one tiny piece. We also would frequent a bakery in town that had great baklava, and the price was discounted if you bought it by the kilo... I always loved a bargain!

3. Peaches
I don't have a picture of the actual peaches, probably because we inhaled them too fast. They were GIANT, like baseballs, and I would sometimes eat three in a day. Inside this delicious pastry that Nikola made resided many peaches (temporarily, or course, as we inhaled this quickly as well). We also enjoyed a peachy jam concoction over pancakes. We'll probably never have peaches like that again in our lives... unless we go back to Turkey.

More of the Turkey Top 20 coming soon...

How Raw is Raw? (and other questions of the curious)

2010-08-22T22:59:00.004+02:00

I can't help but mention how obsessed I am with raw foodism to pretty much everyone I talk with these days, whether it's on this blog, on the phone, on person, or over emails. Many people wonder how raw am I? Is it hard? Don't I get bored? So, here's my experience so far:

Raw agave syrup, carob powder, and cacao nibs went into this delicious shake, along with nut milk and frozen bananas.

How raw am I?
It depends; which is to say, not that raw. Perhaps that's an understatement. Almost every day I will have a nice-sized green smoothie for breakfast, and snack on nuts and dried fruit in the morning if I'm hungry ( I love Brazil nuts and dates together, and also almond butter on dried figs - kind of like a PB&J). Usually lunch is some assortment of greens, veggies, and a dip of sorts (hummus, nut dip, etc... that I have in the fridge, or leftovers) and dinner may or may not be raw. If it's not, it's most likely some type of beans or lentils. But, I drink at least one cup of coffee with milk every day, usually two or three, or maybe a latte. And, of course, there is the occasional day like today: We had pancakes for breakfast, went out for a sugar- and carb-laden fika, then I picked up Thai on the way home for lunch, and went out for burgers with friends tonight. This is absolutely an extreme day in the opposite direction, but goes to show that I am not hard-core. My goal is to be 100% vegan, and then mostly raw, most of the time. However, at this point I'm not willing to let this make for awkward social situations; I have a hard time being hard-nosed about anything, so why start with this?

Nice & Thick Green Smoothie

Is it hard?
Surprisingly, no. At first I wasn't quite sure how to start, but I found some great tips to make things nice and easy. Kristen Suzanne emphasizes simple: have a banana and spinach smoothie every morning; eat a bunch of fruit or veggies for a meal. ChoosingRaw emphasizes adding things, not taking away things (at least, to start); or, eat raw until lunch... or dinner. As I've read more and gotten some recipe books and discovered new blogs, I've gotten all types of inspiration. The biggest take-away for me is that it doesn't have to be all or nothing; but, there are only good benefits from eating more fresh fruits and vegetables daily. And, I've found the more I eat of the good stuff, the less I want the bad stuff.

Do I get bored?
Nope. It's actually refreshing to have a meal that is somewhat simple, and then to be done with it and move on to other things. At the same time, it's fun to track down hard-to-find ingredients (soy lecithin, anyone?) and make a gourmet raw meal a couple times a week. Like I've said before, one of the reasons my interest was peaked in this whole raw food deal was because it presented a whole new culinary realm that I'd not explored before.

No, this is not cat food on lettuce; it's a most delicious garden burger pate with romaine bunz.

Someone asked what my plans are for the coming cooler seasons, both in terms of produce availability as well as just craving something nice and warm on cold, rainy days. To be honest I haven't thought that far... I'm guessing I'll be making lots of soups, but still keeping up with the smoothies and salads. That said, hard-core raw foodists will make a raw soup, and then warm it gently in a dehydrator to take the edge off. (I can't wait to be reunited with my food processor so that I can make raw soups out of squashes and sweet potato and the like.) I assume my consumption will naturally shift to what is fresh and available, I'll have to wait and see if I get bored with my options.

Any other questions? Leave me a comment, I'd love to answer them!

Eight Months

2010-08-20T17:08:00.001+02:00

So, my plan was to record a video of Elijah on his 8-month birthday, and we did that. in fact, we recorded two videos. But they were unsatisfactory so I vetoed those and am going with option C instead:

Elijah Plays the Piano from kate tyo on Vimeo.

As you can see, Elijah is having a ball standing up, and that's just the beginning. Now he is full-fledged crawling, not to mention cruising around the living room while holding on to all the pieces of furniture that are strung together. Yesterday he pulled himself up on a very lightweight end table that we have, and then commenced to push it in front of him as he took some timid steps.

The mobile we have that - in theory - he should have far-outgrown by now is providing a new dimension of excitement, as Elijah has discovered the mirror on it and loves to look into it and see us behind him. Then he turns his head to look at us in the flesh, and gets the biggest kick out of this.

If we're in need of an outing on a given day, we are now qualified park goers; meaning, he is big enough not to fall through the baby swing, so we have more options than just sitting on the benches. We're also loving the library, both for the books (me) and for the social interaction (Elijah). Elijah gets so excited when he spots another baby around his size; I just have to make sure he doesn't claw the eyes out of those that are immobile.

He's showing his first signs of stranger anxiety, and this morning he burst into tears when we encountered a friend in the laundry room. However, he's also teething (the top front two are both j-u-s-t peeking through the gums) and may be feeling a tad out of sorts. And did I mention all the bumps and bruises? All this mobility is hard on everyone, not just mom and dad, who now must put their coffee cups out of reach.

He is just as dear as ever, and seems to be just a bit more cuddly these days. He will often put his head down on our shoulders, or lean back on our chests when sitting in our laps. His naps are getting more regular and more substantial, and he tends to be sleeping through them without waking up in the middle. He also seems to be sleeping longer at night, although I can't say for sure since I pretty much sleep through the nursing sessions.

And that's that... I can't believe he's two-thirds of a year already.

This and That

2010-08-19T09:59:00.002+02:00

If you can't tell, I've been having lots of fun with a) raw UN-cooking (har har) adn b) hipstamatic. Perhaps a little too much fun? Tuesday turned into a delightful day when a short jaunt to the library turned into a fun outing to see the animals at Slottsskögen when we ran into a friend that was babysitting her cousin's baby for the day. I think Elijah got a kick out of the penguins - I know I did - and the seals weren't so bad either. We smelled the goats and elk more than we actually looked at them, which I'm fine with.

Anyway, since we were close to it, I couldn't resist a quick little drop-in at my favorite teeny co-op health foods store, Fram. They were out of my favorite chocolate, which I took as a sign. Not a sign to stop eating chocolate, but a sign to try the dark version instead. It's good too, and may even be vegan (the milk chocolate is decidedly not).

I also went ahead and bought my first bag of nutritional yeast, affectionately termed "nootch" by the raw/vegan community. I had several recipes that called for this, mostly to impart a "cheesy" taste to dips and sauces, but it turns out that you can sprinkle it on jsut about anything for a little added flavor. Or, you can do as I did, and eat it by the spoonful. Weird, yet pleasurable, I assure you.

So, the meal you see here is pasta marinara with green beans and a spicy tahini sauce. The noodles are shaved carrots (I'm dying to get a spiralizer, but that will have to wait a bit), and the marinara was amazing! Check out the spicy tahini sauce here, it's so very easy to make and delicious to eat. Keith and I were both stuffed afterwards, which is hard to achieve - especially for Keith - with a raw meal, so I consider it a grand success.

What else, what else? Last night a collegue of Keith's was in town so we took her out to dinner to a vegetarian restaurant on the avenue. It was decent, although I wasn't totally blown away. It was cafeteria-style but the whole set-up and instructions about what was/wasn't included was a bit confusing, which made it a bit less of a dining "experience" than we had been hoping for. But, overall the food was decent (I had Indonesian chickpea casserole and the salad bar), and I would totally go back if I was wanting a quick lunch while out and about.

Gone Pickin'

2010-08-16T11:18:00.004+02:00

So, I am still totally into this whole raw thing, although I will admit that my will has been weakened slightly by churros (found at the International Market Square during Göteborg Kulturkalaset) and my passionate love affair with Urtekram milk chocolate (don't worry, Keith knows about it... in fact, he's involved). This past weekend, though, we went to a pick-it-yourself farm and came home with buttloads of goodies. It was so awesome, and now I will be practically forced to drink green smoothies three times a day for a week so this great stuff doesn't go to waste.

Here's what we picked:
romaine, red leaf lettuce, chard ("mangold" på svenska), red and green cabbages, frisee, green beans, big beans (the kind where you don't eat the shell, just the huge beans inside), cilantro, parsley, and red onions.

I'd never picked green beans before, but doing so this weekend reminded me of the stories my mom would tell me about when she was a little girl and all the kids could pick green beans and be paid 2 cents a pound... I imagine that was fun for about the first 8 pounds, and after that it got a little repetitive...

I was particularly excited about the huge bunches of cilantro, because in the markets here the only way to buy it is in small quantities, still in the soil. The flavors are weak, and it's expensive this way. But this stuff is great!

My smoothie this morning was kale, frozen bananas, an apple and a carrot, with a bit of ground ginger for flavor and water to thin it out. I'll admit that it was almost too "green" for me, but the flavors were good. The key for me to really enjoy my smoothies is to have enough icy fruit in the mix. I could put in loads and loads of greens and hardly notice, as long as I also put in a box of berries.
Having all this amazing produce at our fingertips made me even more envious of my moth-in-law's garden, which I know is bursting at the seems right about now. Hopefully when we have our own yard next year I'll be able to have a little garden myself. What fun!

a night on the town; or, guess who finally got hipstamatic?

2010-08-12T16:38:00.001+02:00

an awesome irish band was rocking out under this tent

what all the cool kidz are wearing these days

the gothenburg eye, alternatively named the gothenburg stye

the most delicious double rainbow

She said WHAT?

2010-08-04T20:25:00.003+02:00

If you're into breastfeeding and/or gossip, you may have read (here or here for example) about the stir supermodel Gisele Bundchen has caused during an interview in the September issue of Harper's Bazaar UK in which she says there should be a law mandating new moms to breastfeed for six months. While I wholeheartedly agree, I was saddened to read that Gisele only breastfed her son for three weeks due to not wanting to be photographed in public (er, Starbucks, specifically) while breastfeeding.

She addressed the stir she caused on her website's blog, for the most part missing the mark - in my opinion - by apologizing for offending people; I left the following comment:

I applaud you for being so pro-breastfeeding and I, too, would love to see 100% of mamas practice extended breastfeeding (WHO recommends a minimum of two years, by the way). However, I was extremely taken aback by another quote in the article that said, "“I probably should have persevered a bit longer than three weeks,[...] but I can’t be sitting in Starbucks and breastfeeding because they (photographers) are taking pictures.” (as quoted from http://bostonherald.com/track/inside_track/view/20100803main_track_story/srvc=home&position=5) This breaks my heart because what will really make a difference in our country is for women to SEE women like you doing what you are advocating for, breastfeeding. In fact, it's not only women who need to see breastfeeding, but men and children as well. Breastfeeding NEEDS to be normalized, and you were in a powerful position to do just that. Perhaps, if you have a second child, you will proudly breastfeed for all those photographers, and those published pictures can send a message that is even more powerful than this one, of saying one thing but doing another.

Seven (and a half) Months

2010-08-01T15:53:00.000+02:00

Holy crap this has been a big month. In the span of two days Elijah a) crawled, b) pulled himself up, c) went from laying down to sitting and d) had his first swim in the sea.
Other recent enjoyments include experiencing watermelon, drinking from a glass (with assistance, of course) and trying out the abundant produce that Turkey had to offer. He's an absolute water animal, and within a week of being in Turkey he had learned to hold on to the side of the pool. He loves to splash and kick, and even goes completely under the surface while snug in our arms. It's incredible to watch him learn things literally every day.

Since coming home from Turkey Elijah has been taking his baths solo, so as to have more room to splash around. Gone - or at least, less frequent - are the days of mom or dad cuddling our tiny baby while gently sponging away his non-existent filth. I put some blocks in the tub for him to play with, but he much prefers ripping up the alligator-shaped rubber mat from the bottom of the tub and chewing on it.

At the suggestion of my friend Jane, I put together a treasure basket for Elijah filled with household items for him to explore and play with (here's a link she passed on as well). This was a most brilliant suggestion and Elijah loves to take everything out of the basket and chew on it. I also went to IKEA and picked up a box of colorful magnets that I put on the freezer door. Now, while I'm cooking dinner each evening Elijah operates the Magnet Station, which basically involves taking every magnet off the door, putting it into his mouth then onto the floor, and ends with him making out with the door, itself. It's pretty cute.

And yes, he's mobile. Sometimes it's a timid crawl (although this is still in the works), but mostly it's an I-Don't-Know-What. All I know is that he can move. I put him down in one place and when I turn around he's in another with the computer cord sticking out of his mouth. How did this happen? Last night Keith and I were sitting at the dinner table. Elijah was taking the day off from solid foods due to some unknown rash, so he was playing behind us. At one point I realized Elijah was being awfully quiet, and when I looked around he was hanging onto Keith's chair, having moved across the rug and then pulling himself up without a sound. He was pleased as punch and, quite frankly, so were we, despite what this means for the levels of chaos and sanity in our home.
He continues talking up the storm. In addition to the sounds "ma", "ba" and "pa", he has added "da". He can also be very loud. I remember when Elijah was very small and made no sounds, and my friends with older babies would come to visit. Those older babies could Sca-REAM, and I always thought, my, what loud children they are! Well, on Friday we went to visit my friend and her new baby and guess who had the loud kid then?

Wordless Wednesday: Babywearing

2010-07-28T08:57:00.004+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is Wordless Wednesday: Babywearing Photos! Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

Keith wearing Auntie Steph's handmade sling

Me with Elijah in our Moby-type wrap

Auntie Steph using the African wrap she brought us from Ghana

My favorite and most used carrier, the Ergo Sport

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Amy @ Anktangle—wordless wednesday: babywearing in the first week

Timbra @ Bosoms & Babes—Every-WEAR we go

Yuliya @ She Suggests—Babywearing Fashion Show

Kaitlin Rose @ Bring Birth Home—Babywearing Photo Virtual Fashion Show

Melodie @ Breastfeeding Moms
Unite!—Sentimental Baby Carrier

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Worst babywearing photo ever

Kate @ KateIsFun—Wordless Wednesday: Babywearing

Lauren @ Hobo Mama—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding and babywearing

Emily @ Baby Dickey—Wordless Wednesday: babywearing

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—Wordless Wednesday: Every Babywearing Photo

Natasha @ naturalurbanmama—Wordless Wednesday: My Favourite Babywearing Pics

Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—Baby Wearing

Brooke @ Milk Maid Mama—Baby Wearing

Veronica @ Crunchy VT Mommy—Wordless Wednesday: Babywearing Photos

Anne @ Dou-la-la—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival- Babywearing!

And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Sherrie Green—Wordless Wednesday: Babywearing Photos

Breastfeeding and Mothering

2010-07-27T09:57:00.004+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to http://www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about mothering through breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

In my post The Importance of Breastfeeding I touched on how I think that learning to read Elijah's cues for breastfeeding and other needs now is a precedent for learning to read his other needs as he grows older. Through breastfeeding I have learned - and continue to do so - a lot about Elijah. But, I'm also learning a lot about myself and how I want to mother.

Elijah needed these things when he was born: Love, milk, changed diapers. Love was super easy, of course; we could hardly stand to put him down, and pretty much mandated that he was held every moment, not left alone. (How heartbreaking, I thought, to leave a baby that has spent his entire existence not just in contact but physically connected to me, by himself.) Keith claimed the diaper changing task, which left me with milk duty. (Keith still jokes that he tried breastfeeding Elijah but it just didn't really work out for them.) Elijah nursed like nobody's business that first night, and it was great for both of us. But within a day or two it was evident that we still had some learning to do. His latch was the most painful thing ever, and I could hardly stand to nurse. I broke down in tears several times knowing I desperately needed to breastfeed him while desperately not wanting to feel that pain. I felt like a failure, convinced that I was one of "those women" that "just can't breastfeed". Keith diligently paged through the Dr. Sears book for helpful info, and called our midwife for pointers.

Let me just take a minute to say that I wish the words did not exist in the English language that convey to woman that she can't, or shouldn't, breastfeed. First off, these things are flat-out lies; second, for a woman that is having a hard time getting started like I was, even if she always intended to breastfeed, like I had, these words can be the open window through which she jumps with her child to breastfeeding suicide.

And so, I am so grateful that no one ever said those things to me. Keith, clueless as he was about breastfeeding, never suggested I stop; instead he researched the issues. My midwife told me over the phone that she was not at all worried about me or Elijah, that we would do just fine, and then went on to give amazing tips, advice and encouragement both over the phone and in person. While we didn't improve immediately, but my outlook did. The help I received gave me what I needed to keep at it, to keep trying.

While we were trying to get into our breastfeeding groove, our nighttime feeds looked like this: when Elijah was ready to eat, I would wake Keith up (we had to add a clause that allowed him one full minute to gather his bearings so that I wouldn't get frustrated at his stoner face and he could have a clue as to what the freak was going on). I would sit in the chair by the bed, and Keith would bring me all the pillows, blankets, munchies, and drinks that I needed, and help me position Elijah correctly. This part was kind of like hanging a painting. Unlike my now older - bigger - Elijah, my newborn Elijah had to be positioned just so, and Keith would say things like "a little higher... no, a little lower... good, now to the right!" and so on until all was swell. I was really eager to nurse lying down because I wanted to be able to sleep while I nursed, but that seemed the most troublesome right in the beginning given Elijah's teeny mouth. But, one night, having had a run of successful nurses behind me, I decided to give it a go on my own, and let Keith keep sleeping. Low and behold, it worked! I can still remember the complete and utter euphoria I felt as I heard Elijah's loud gulps, felt his non-painful suck, and felt the oxytocin literally coursing through my veins, head to toe; I felt utterly and completely high. Elijah had learned to breastfeed, and so had I.

This early lesson in breastfeeding was also a lesson in mothering: learning to mother well is totally worth the effort and pain it takes to get there. As Elijah gets older the stakes will get higher, I'm sure. We will encounter things where there is more to lose - and to gain - then we've dealt with so far. Trials may last years, not days; learning may require a new bar of humbleness and forgiveness and love, and will involve my baby's tender emotions. But looking back at our beginning and seeing how fruitful it has been despite the challenge will be life-giving. I'm sure of it.

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—Mothering in Second Place

Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Mothering

Lexi @ Life As A Mommy—Breastfeeding for Me

Timbra @ Bosoms & Babes—The Mother I never thought I'd Be

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Breastfeeding taught me I'm a lousy mom

Natasha @ naturalurbanmama—Mothering through Brestfeeding:as Mother Nature intended

Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—Nursing says it best

Kaitlin Rose @ Bring Birth Home—Nurturing the (Nursing) Mother

Kate @ KateIsFun—Breastfeeding and Mothering

Emily @ Baby Dickey—How breastfeeding has shaped my role as a mother

And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Katherine Anderson—Mothering Defined by Nursing

Babywearing

2010-07-26T15:48:00.007+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to http://www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about babywearing. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

**HERE is a link to a previous post on babywearing**

Hells Yeah, I babywear! This is one of the things I was most anticipatory of in those final days of pregnancy with Elijah. Keith has an image of me forever burned in his brain of the morning after Elijah was born: I woke up around 8:30 or so, just six hours after Elijah was born. I giddily left the room and, with my lap top in front of me, figured out how to tie the 5 metres of Moby-esque-ness around my jiggly, freshly partumed body. Knowing how important skin-to-skin was, I did this bare-chested. I went back to the room to get Elijah and Keith woke up, heavy and confused in his own birth hang-over, to see his wife standing before him like a bare-breasted Amazon, ginormous bosoms askew, smiling proudly.

Even with my ambitious start, it took a little bit of practice to feel comfortable with babywearing. The newborn hold in the Moby requires - at least at first and at least for us - two people, and Keith and I debated over what was too tight and too loose. And, isn't it funny how easy it to overestimate the fragility of a newborn, despite the fact that, in our case, he just spent five and half hours being squished out a hole that basically equates to trying to fit a sausage casing around an entire pig? But, eventually we got it and Elijah started to feel like my second skin, and I loved to wear him for hours at a time while he napped and while I did what 21st century parents do: looked at all the pictures we just took of him while he was awake.

Early on, Keith would wear Elijah in the Moby when we went out because his winter coat could fit around the both of them; mine could not. So, when Keith went back to work a few weeks later I started fiddling around with the Ergo, and ended up wearing Elijah sideways, over my coat. It worked really well.

But, here's something I didn't expect. For being the country that birthed the Baby Bjorn, Sweden gave me some Cah-RAY-zee looks as I wore Elijah out and about. Mostly, people would just stare. On Valentine's Day we went out for brunch and the couple next to us, the woman ripely pregnant herself, stared, conferred in whispers to each other, and stared again. I gave a smile to the man as if to say, babywearing is awesome, want to ask me about it? He looked away as if to respond, I do not see you, Crazy Lady.

So, while I know that baby wearing is awesome, as Elijah does too (he always gets almost silent and very attentive when he's on me, really taking in the whole world), it's taken a little bit of self-reflection and affirmation to not care what on-lookers think. I'm almost there.

On the flip side, as I was reminded this morning in Istanbul's airport whe I spotted a like-minded mama, I always love to see other parents wearing their children. Sometimes I see them and they don't see me, but I feel all happy inside that someone else is all "crazy" like I am and appreciates having their little (and big) ones close. Occasioinally we'll make eye contact and -unlike our brunch neighbors - exchange a little glance on understanding, encouragement, and respect.

Speaking of those things, I feel that that's what Elijah gets from being worn on me regularly. That quiet, alert mode he enters into allows him to take in the world from my vantage point, to understand things in a greater context. His physical closeness allows for my comfort and reassurance to always be near him, whether it be a kiss on the head, a song in his ear, or a squeeze of his sausage thighs which emits his sweet laugh. Sometimes when we are walking down the street I will look down and catch him gazing at me. As our eyes meet his smile opens like the sun after a rain storm and we are both drenched in love and warm fuzzies.

I'm pretty sure the point of this post in the carnival is to connect it to breastfeeding, but I've not nailed this combination just yet. It's been done, but I wouldn't say it feels totally natural. However, having Elijah so close to me makes it very easy to read his signals that he'd like to breastfeed. Anything from reaching up my neck with his hand, to rooting to full-on groping lets me know that he's ready to eat or nurse to sleep. I know, too, that wearing him allows my hormones to respond to him and helps with my milk production.

We have a stroller, a giant European one that takes curbs like they're dust bunnies. I'll tell you, what the Europeans lack in car size they more than make up for with their perambulating SUVs. We use it occasionally, and it certainly is useful to carry back whatever we've picked up shopping - provided I'm wearing Elijah. Sometimes I am truly grateful for it, if it's especially warm out or if my back is feeling a bit out of sorts. But most of the time I spend the outing wishing Elijah were closer, and I like to think he wishes the same as well.

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Babywearing

Emily @ Baby Dickey—do you babywear?

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Babywearing vs carrying

Amy @ Anktangle—I love babywearing

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—Our Babywearing Journey

Kimberly @ Monkey Tales Mama Thoughts—Wearing My Baby

Lexi @ Life As A Mommy—Baby on Board - Literally

Sarah @ Most Revealing—Do you babywear?

Kate @ KateIsFun—Babywearing

Melodie @ Breastfeeding Moms Unite!—Do you wear your babies?

Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—Wearing My Babies

Timbra @ Babes and Bosoms—Wearing her everywhere

Natasha@naturalurbanmama—Breastfeeding and Babywearing

And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Amanda Watsky—My Evolution in Babywearing

Nighttime Parenting & Nursing

2010-07-24T21:43:00.005+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about nighttime parenting and nursing. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

We are on vacation right now and the other day I ran into an English woman and her 18-year-old daughter, both of whom live in Rome. They instantly fell in love with Elijah and we struck up a conversation. Minutes into it, this woman inquired how he was sleeping at night. I responded, as I always do, that he is sleeping with us in bed and still nurses throughout the night. "Oh, no, no, no!", she offered, "I'm a family counselor and I spend all my time trying to get babies out of the bed!" She went on, as if the fact that she was a professional would somehow inspire me to acknowledge, and then right, the world that I had so clearly flipped on its head for me and my family. Instead I wondered if she counseled her clients to share cigarettes with their teenaged daughters as she was doing with hers, but I kept that to myself. She went on about how Elijah was forming an addiction, going on to say that he would be 18 years old and still sleeping in my bed. Um, has that like, EVER happened? Come on, Lady. I countered that there are lots of benefits to co-sleeping, to which she jumped in with, "Well yes, he doesn't cry as much because mom and dad are there to meet all his needs!" And her point was...?

In my experience, the combination of co-sleeping and breastfeeding on cue makes for relatively easy nights. Before I recount the benefits, let me list the hard parts: Sometimes I get uncomfortable lying on my side when Elijah wants to nurse for long periods of time. When this happens I gently try to break his latch, or if he insists on continuing to nurse I'll switch sides. There are times when Elijah seems to want to nurse the entire night (during a growth spurt for instance, or when he's bothered by his teeth). This can be trying, and makes for a night of little sleep. Fortunately these times are rare and I remind myself that only I, my child's mother, can comfort him in his need, and that these days will so quickly pass and we will be on to the next stage. That, and a little nap, puts these things into an enjoyable perspective for me.

And now, the benefits... as the family counselor so astutely pointed out, Elijah doesn't cry during the night because his needs are met. He. Does. Not. Cry. At. Night. I wake just as he's stirring, and we move seamlessly into nursing before either of us is fully awake. This in and of itself would be enough for me to co-sleep and breastfeed on cue, but it turns out I sleep pretty well, too. Because I'm not staying up or waking up again to deposit Elijah onto another surface once he's finished, I get more shut-eye than I suppose I would otherwise (I don't actually know as I've never done this). As time goes on our night nurses become foggier and foggier in memory. I suppose this is because Elijah and I are both so adept at the parts we play in our nightly dance that we can, literally , do it in our sleep. I am giddy over these times of cuddling through the night, whether we're nursing or just sleeping next to each other. Sometimes Keith sees us in the morning, me curled around Elijah and Elijah curled into me, some part of each of us touching the other, and he's touched by the sweetness and the bond that is so evident. I don't view nighttime as a much-needed respite, or a time to "get away"; instead it is a fortress for our bond, where it is nurtured almost effortlessly.

I have been reading lately about how humans are "carry mammals", meant to have our young near us at all times. I've also been reading about the amazing intricacies of the physiological breastfeeding relationship, like the fact that a baby's saliva transmits specific needs to the mother and the milk that she makes next is made-to-order. I very much feel that having Elijah close to me and giving easy access to the breast throughout the night provides even more of "the good stuff" than if we closed down shop for the nighttime hours. I kinda like being the 24-hour drive-thru for my son, no fries needed.

And so, for us, breastfeeding is the key to nighttime parenting, which, in turn, benefits our daytime relationship. We're both more rested, our multi-faceted connection stays intact, and it's another way that I learn about my son and his needs.

I wonder sometimes about how subsequent children will impact my nighttime parenting. Will there be room in the bed for more than one child at a time? (Keith doesn't think so.) What about if two (or more) are nursing simultaneously; what would this mean for nighttime parenting? I don't worry about it though, because I know that when the time comes I'll follow my instinct as I did with Elijah.

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Nighttime Nursing

Emily @ Baby Dickey—Nighttime Nursing & Parenting

Timbra @ Bosoms & Babes—Will we ever sleep again?

Lexi @ Life As A Mommy—Night Shift

Kate @ KateIsFun—Nighttime Parenting & Nursing

Kaitlin Rose @ Bring Birth Home—How I Parent & Nurse at Night

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—How do I sleep this early

Lauren @ Hobo Mama—Nighttime parenting and the right attitude

Natasha @ naturalurbanmama—Nighttime Parenting and Nursing: I really just want to sleep!

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—Co-sleeping and Breastfeeding to Function

And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Jasmine Jafferali—Jasmine Jafferali

The Importance of Breastfeeding

2010-07-23T12:07:00.007+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to http://www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about the importance of breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

I remember being about six or seven months pregnant with Elijah and realizing that I felt pretty prepared for the birth. Sure, there were things that we still needed to get (diapers, a changing table) and things to arrange (renting the birth pool), but we had done a lot of reading and mental prep and planning for how we hoped the birth would go. I also realized that I hadn't really done anything to prepare for breastfeeding, and I knew it was important that I start.

I started doing my research, talking with friends that had breastfed before me, and reading, reading, reading. I started with The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, a book that also fulfills one of the requirements for my doula training course. So, I was reading it with one eye critiquing the book, and the other eye taking it all in. My critiquing eye honed in on the fact that this book was totally pro-breastfeeding in every and all circumstances, and I noted that this could be off-putting for a woman that is not sure if she wants to breastfeed. As I read more, however, I really started to understand that vast importance that the breastfeeding relationship holds not only for baby and mother, but even for the greater good of society. By the time Elijah was born I knew that breastfeeding him went far beyond simply providing nutritional nourishment for him and would provide me with immense benefits as well.

If you've nursed a newborn, you probably remember those early days where they literally seem to nurse night and day, day and night. In my book, the answer for just about everything is to bring your child to the breast. Blocked duct? Nurse more. Mother or baby not feeling well? Nurse more. Fussy baby? Nurse more. Low milk supply? Nurse more. Simple, no?

I remember times when Elijah would start to fuss after being away from the breast for only ten minutes or so, and I almost felt stupid for offering it again. And yet, every time, it was what he needed. So many times, when someone else would be holding him and he'd start to get a little antsy, I at first felt embarrassed to venture that he needed to eat again. But, as those first weeks so quickly went by, and time and again breastfeeding kept him calm and serene, I became more and more sure of myself, more and more sure of what the breastfeeding relationship had to offer.

As I nursed and nursed and nursed and nursed some more, I noticed that breastfeeding provided a respite for me. It was an excuse to step away from any and all things that demanded my focus away from my child. It was an opportunity to lay down with my sweet baby and grab a few moments of sleep. It was an open door to cuddle and love this precious progeny, something no one ever wishes they had done less of.

As Elijah grew bigger and got older, it became an opportunity to interact with each other on a more intimate level than we might do during the hustle and bustle of our days. When he first latches on there is a determined eagerness that is too distracting for him to focus on anything else. But, after a few moments, he locks eyes with me, and we are lost in each other, sometimes for a moment, sometimes for much longer. Sometimes I will tickle him gently, or play This Little Piggy with him, and he'll take a break from his meal to laugh out loud. Lately he's taken to blowing bubbles in his milk, so that it spatters over the both of us. In the mornings, when Keith brings Elijah back to bed where I am still sleeping, as soon as he sees me he reaches his hands out and starts screeching his insistence until he grabs me and latches on.

And so, for me, the importance of breastfeeding is this: It is a built-in mechanism that directs our focus back to each other. It is a built-in timer that makes sure we are connected eight or 10 or 12 times a day. It's like on LOST, when that button had to be pressed every few minutes; no matter how distracted I or he becomes, we are reset over and over again so that our connection is not severed. If that connection is not made, it just might blow up this little one's world.

I believe that this frequent and unhindered connection through breastfeeding allows me to more fully know my child. I believe that this is preparing me to be able to know and anticipate my child's needs long beyond the duration of our breastfeeding relationship, even into those sometimes rocky and tumultuous adolescent years. I believe that the breastfeeding relationship does carry implications for how my son will grow and develop and respond to the world.

This is why breastfeeding is important to me.

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Importance of Breastfeeding

Sara @ The Covered Wagon—Nursing a Food Allergic Child

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Importance of breastfeeding

Timbra @ Bosoms & Babes—The best non-decision I ever made

Shary @ Mama Fish—Why Breast Milk is Best

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—I Breastfeed For Me

Lauren @ Hobo Mama—Why breastfeeding is important

Kate @ KateIsFun—The Importance of Breastfeeding

Kaitlin Rose @ Bring Birth Home—Breastfeeding Came Naturally

Brooke @ Milk Maid Mamma—Why I Chose to Breastfeed

Lexi @ Life as a Mommy—Special Bonds

Whitney @ According to Waddlebug:The (Un)Balancing act of Motherhood—Importance of Breastfeeding

Natasha @ naturalurbanmama—Importance of Breastfeeding:X-men and Faberge Shampoo

Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Wheat allergies and working

And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Jen Karsbaek—Breastfeeding Helps Me Love My Son

Snacktime

2010-07-21T09:19:00.006+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to http://www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding Photos! Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Emily @ Baby Dickey—Wordless Wednesday: breastfeeding

Timbra @ Bosoms and Babes—Firsts Wordless Wednesday: Carnival Day

Kimberly @ Monkey Tales Mama Thoughts—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding Photos

Melodie @ Breastfeeding Moms Unite!—Breastfeeding a Toddler: It Doesn't Matter How Big They Get

Sara @ The Covered Wagon—Wordless Wednesday

Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—Favorite Breastfeeding Photos

BoobiesNBabies @ Num In Mind—Wordless Wednesday: DD2 Breastfeeding Photos

Lauren @ Hobo Mama—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding by the waterfall

Whitney @ According To Waddlebug: The (Un)Balancing Act of Motherhood—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding Goober Pie

Shary @ Mama Fish—Wordless Wednesday: Favorite Breastfeeding Photos

Anne @ Dou-la-la—Wordless Wednesday: Breastfeeding Cafe

Lexi @ Life As A Mommy—Boob Love

Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—Not Really Wordless Wednesday: First Breastfeeding Photo

Natasha @ Natural Urban Mama—Wordless Wednesday: My Fave Breastfeeding Pics

Kaitlin Rose @ Bring Birth Home—Wordless Wednesday - Family Nursing

Becca @ Mama B—Nursies and Night Nights

Kate @ KateIsFun—Snack Time

And of course Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is a slide show of 122 breastfeeding photos!—Breastfeeding Slideshow

Breastfeeding: Nursing in Public

2010-07-20T15:59:00.007+02:00

Welcome to The Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival!
This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to http://www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about nursing in public. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

Early on I decided that breastfeeding would be as awkward or natural as I determined it to be, particularly with regards to nursing in public. I knew that if I exuded confidence in nursing Elijah in front of people then it would be seen as nothing out of the norm (at least, the company I was in would hopefully feel compelled to act that way, and hold their tongues if they felt otherwise). I've proudly nursed Elijah on cue, meaning when he has desired to eat or be comforted. This rarely coincides with being in a "convenient" place or at the "right" time; but then again, those terms only refer to what I make them to be. This has resulted in his being breastfed in a plethora of surroundings.

Here's a non-exhaustive list of the places that I've nursed Elijah in the past seven months:

In bed

On the couch

At the table during dinner

On 20+ different planes, in seven different countries, and at least five different states

At the restaurant for our anniversary dinner, and many other restaurants

Cafes, indoors and outdoors

In the Ergo while walking

On trains and buses

After a hike to the highest point in Gothenburg (it's not very high)

In the car, Elijah still secured in his car seat, and me in mine (I consider this my hidden talent)

At church

on a grassy patch next to the canal, and various other parks and green spaces

Whole Foods

Sitting on the side of the pool

In front of my grandfather

At Chick-Fil-A

At Bloomingdales

At the seaside

At the US Embassy in Stockholm during a meeting

On a bench outside the outlet stores

While buying icecream with my mother-in-law

In the bathtub

While sipping adult beverages

In a movie theatre
At a dinner party hosted by Keith's boss
At the doctor, while she examined me

I'm proud of my list, not only because it has some weird and random places in it, but also because it represents the freedom I feel in breastfeeding Elijah. I definitely didn't feel 100% confident in what I was doing or where I was doing it from the get-go, but pretending I did helped me a whole heck of a lot.

Additionally, I have to add that having my first breastfeeding experience come about in Sweden has been an incredible encouragement to getting over any reservations I had about breastfeeding in public. Sweden has something like a 99% rate of exclusive breastfeeding among mothers leaving the hospital, and it is common to see women nursing everywhere, as I have done. Swedish men, it seems, expect to see breastfeeding everywhere, and none of them ever seem to feel awkward about it, even coming up to have a look at babies while they're lunching. In the U.S. I sometimes get the sense that breastfeeding is the elephant in the room. Little kids will also unabashedly come up and peer at Elijah as he eats away; they are never taken aback by a baby at the breast and instead seem intrigued by this little person. Thanks, Sweden!

Here are more posts by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

Emily @ Baby Dickey—baby eats when baby wants: nursing in public
BoobiesNBabies @ Num In Mind—NIP a Lil Giant, How We Do It
Sylko @ Chaotic Mama—Breastfeeding Carnival: Nursing in Public
Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl—My Biggest Advocate
Timbra @ Bosoms and Babes—Making it easy for everyone to nurse
Kaitlin @ Bringing Birth Home—Breastfeeding Uncovered – A Peaceful Protest
Claire @ Geeky Gaming Mama—Nursing in Public: What Makes it Easier
Brooke @ Milk Maid Mama—Nursing in Public
Kathy @ Musings From an Arid Neverland—Do I need fancy clothes to nurse in public
Shary @ Mama Fish—NIP: Nursing in Public
Kimberly @ Monkey Tales Mama Thoughts—Nips: Not those, well kind of those
Shelly @ Lousy Mom—Breastfeeding Public
Sarah @ Most Revealing—Nip
Renee @ Just the 5 of us!—No Reservations
Natasha @ Natural Urban Mamas—Nursing in Public-Not a Big Deal
StorkStories @ Stork Stories… Birth & Breastfeeding—Little Old Men… & Nursing in Public (Back by “PUBLIC” Demand)
And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s Blog today is Heather Hendriksen—Tips for Nursing in Public

Holiday Food

2010-07-19T12:21:00.001+02:00

I've taken a bit of a break from my mostly raw food consumption while on vacation (though green smoothies still find their way into our days here and there), and we've had some truly amazing meals made right in our own kitchen and from the grill.

The fish - both before and after - is seabring, something I only associated with Michael Scott's car up to this point; I like the fish way more than I like the car.

Marija and Nikola (our Holiday Partners in Crime) found these amazing squash flowers at the market last week. We enjoyed them three ways: fried, stuffed with cheese and fried, and stuffed w/ bulgar and tomato and parsely then baked. Amazing! My favorite were the plain fried ones, almost like french fries...

We stopped paying five Turkish lira for fresh orange juice down at the bar and have been making our own several times a day, as well as my newest obsession: iced coffee, made with instant coffee and whipped with the stick blender (another reason I'm so glad I brought mine), creating a brilliantly frothy top. This will definitely be my summer drink when we return home.

What are you eating and drinking these days?

Book Giveaway

2010-07-17T13:02:00.002+02:00

One of the blogs I read, Kristin Suzanne's Green Mommy Blog (written by the woman that authored the raw books I've been using) is having a giveaway of my favorite pregnancy book ever, Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. In order to enter, go to this post and leave a comment about why you'd like the book.

I love this book so much, and recommend it to everyone I know who is pregnant. Those that have read it love it, too. (One of my friends read it just a few weeks before giving birth, and one of the phrases a woman in the book used was particularly useful to my friend and she credits that with helping her have a fast, relatively easy labor.) The first part is filled with positive natural birth stories, and this is particularly great if you're dealing with fear about childbirth, or have heard a lot of stories that are filled with trauma and "all the things that could go wrong". The second part is filled with Ina May's birth practices, explaining how she sees birth and why. I love this part because she has a lot of science to back up her practices, but also some things that she does because it has simply worked in her experience.

If you're pregnant, or know someone who is, find a way to read this book!

Baklava By the Pool

2010-07-16T08:13:00.001+02:00

Because, some days, it's just too hot to get out...

Fully Prepared

2010-07-14T16:25:00.001+02:00

Elijah has been enjoying the sun as much as we have, though in slightly less quantity so as not to scorch his sweet silky baby skin. As the picture suggests, he certainly prefers chewing his hat over wearing it.

When Elijah's not covered A to Z in SPF 50 wear, he is relishing the hot weather by being naked in the shade.

A Little Bit of Heaven (Turkish-Style)

2010-07-13T15:22:00.001+02:00

This is how our dinner out started last evening.
A very good sign indeed.

Farewell Smoothie

2010-07-11T21:51:00.001+02:00

This is the first of two smoothie concoctions I made the morning we left for vacation, in an [extremely successful] effort to use up all the produce we had. This particular smoothie is, if I recall correctly, made of spinach, avocado, apple, basil, and frozen mango. I find that the smoothies that are truly green in color (and not just the color of an ingredient or two) are the most refreshing, almost clean tasting.

I'm a bit of a Smoothie Nerd and even brought my stick blender with me... glad I did, as the one in our rental house couldn't blend water.

My Placenteal Fantasy PART DOS

2010-07-02T10:56:00.003+02:00

Is that how you spell DOS? I don't know; I took German.

Anyway.

My work is done. Complete. Finito. Slutat. I'm so proud. This morning I didn't even mind when Elijah got up at 5AM and Keith wasn't here to get up with him and let me sleep (as per usual) (not the Keith being gone part, the Elijah waking up butt-early part).

So, up we got, and I checked my dehydrating placenta pieces in the oven. Things were coming along quite nicely, which surprised me since I'd only just put them in six and half hours prior. I decided to give them another hour or so to finish up... you don't want chewy placenta jerky bits when you're encapsulating (placenta jerky on the other hand is an option I had not considered... next time?).

We got a bit sidetracked by faux nap attempt, but then it was back to the grind, so to speak (har har), of obliterating my organ creation into teeny tiny particulates. Then, came the encapsulating, which worked like a charm.

And, Voila!, now my placenta is contained in 96 capsules that I can ingest at my leisure, and with white wine, it's been suggested... don't mind if I do!

And so, if you are my friend and you are having a baby and would like me to encapsulate your placenta for you I would be most excited to do so.

(If you're still thumping your head trying to figure out why one would want to do that, start here.)

My Placenteal Fantasy

2010-07-01T22:25:00.004+02:00

Every so often Keith turns to me and says something like, "How did we get so crunchy?"; or, "We really are crunchy, aren't we?"; or, "Are we crunchy?!"

I don't know; and yes; and yes.

Not totally so, in an all-consuming, living-off-the-grid, smell-me-coming, kind of way. (Not Yet.)

But, we're kind of crunchy.

freshly thawed and ready to go; can you see the "tree of life" in it?

Tonight, at the height of my crunchiness, I am waiting for my placenta to finish steaming after which I will dehydrate it in the oven (for lack of a proper dehydrator) until it's crunchy, after which I will - tomorrow - encapsulate it using my very own encapsulation device.

I don't know who's more excited... Me, because my Placenteal Dream is finally being realized; or Keith, because that weird organ is FINALLY out of the freezer and there's more room for frozen pizza and ice cream (and freezing bananas, of course).

A comment on this post put me in touch with this doula who so generously offered to Skype with me from across the world and teach me how to do this. I jumped on that like white on rice, although it's taken three months to actually get my act together... "Things" needed to happen. Mainly I needed to find an encapsulation device (hard to do in Sweden but no problem at Cambridge Naturals), but the time gave me some space to get over my slight squeamishness about the whole thing. Like, taking the placenta pills isn't at all gross to me, but having to make them by handling that squishy thing was just beyond the boundaries of my comfort zone. And the blood! There's a lot of blood in a placenta, you know. And it's not just mine but Elijah's, too. And it's slimy, and I have to use my cutting board, and I both really wanted to do this and not, at the same time.

It's steamed w/ chili pepper, lemon grass, ginger and lime... kind of like a Thai dish, no?

I will say that t didn't help a few minutes ago when I pricked it with a fork to see if it was done and blood squirted all over my shirt; guess it wasn't done yet. But, I'm also really glad that I am
doing this, and that I know how to do this for myself or for others in the future.

So, that's what I'm doing tonight... Just cookin' a placenta.

Six and a Half Months

2010-07-01T09:50:00.004+02:00

I took Elijah for his six-month check-up (half a month late) this week at the BVC. He's weighing in at just over 9k / 20 lbs, and measures at 71.5 cm / 28 in. They didn't measure his rolls, however, which seem to be appearing in multiples... I am always finding more creases in his fat thighs to caress, and his belly skin is still too big for his body so it just sits on top of itself in adorable ways.

He is sitting so well and I'm not exactly sure when that happened, except that one day, BAM!, there he stayed, upright, when I sat him on the ground. That makes things easier because he's pretty done with just lying on his back these days, and the only alternative was to be on his stomach which meant spit-up everywhere, all the time. Now he sits and plays with a few toys in front of him although he's still figuring out how to actually grasp the toys instead of pushing them further away.

I really, truly, wanted to breastfeed Elijah exclusively for one year, but it was not meant to be. The last month or so he started stalking the food we were putting into our mouths, all the while making loud smacking noises with his lips. Being a huge food lover myself, I couldn't deny him, much as I wanted too.

I'm not really into the various mushes and sludges that you can buy in powdered form from the grocery store, so we started last week with a bit of avocado and have given him tastes of smoothies and cucumbers to gnaw on. Right now he's still in the trial phase, really only tasting the food and trying to understand the experience of it. Soon, though, I'm sure he'll click into the mechanics of swallowing and he won't have that pained look in his face whenever something thicker than breast milk finds its way down his throat.

Of course we are still breastfeeding, something I plan to do for years. YEARS. YEARS!! You hear that, people?! No, I don't plan to be one of those mothers featured on 20/20 or Maury Povich, breastfeeding a nine year old. But, the WHO recommends a minimum of two years of breastfeeding, and the benefits only continue, so why not? I think the breastfeeding relationship between mother and child is one of the most precious beautiful things.

Elijah is just starting to show signs of attachment - if that's the right word? - to me. When I come into the room his face lights up. Sometimes when I leave the room Keith says that Elijah will look at the door and cry a little. He's wanting to be held a bit more it seems (my Ergo is great for this; I've been throwing him on my back a lot more to get stuff done around the apartment), and really enjoys being close. Even when we're sleeping at night, I'm much more aware of his need to be touching me, with a hand or a foot somewhere attached to my person.

He had his first non-family member babysitter yesterday; my friend Margot took him to the library and to fika while I enjoyed a most heavenly birthday massage. Margot said he slept through it all in the Ergo, so I consider that a success.

My, my, how quickly he grows.

Who Are You?

2010-06-29T18:14:00.002+02:00

Every so often I get curious about my readers... Is it comprised solely of the five to ten of you that I know are reading? Who is that person from Puerto Rico that hit me up five times daily for about a week (Fe?)? Are my high school friends still checking me out occasionally? Do the authors of the blogs I link to or comment on wondering "who is this Kateisfun"? Why do so many people search for "Poor Man's Salsa" on Google, making that one of my most popular posts? More importantly, does anyone actually like my Poor Man's Salsa (because, frankly, I don't and haven't made it in ages)? What do you think of my impassioned posts depicting my birth and parenting choices?

Consider this the delurking post, where all you readers (be it five of you of 50 of you) are hereby cordially invited to leave a little hello in the comments, and also a general invite to comment more freely in general. Yes, the internet is a brilliant way to be anonymous, exercising that inner Peeping Tom, or simply get ideas; but it's also a fun place to dialogue, and I'm looking for a little of that in my blogging experience.

I'll go first:

I am Kate, aka, KateIsFun, and I write this blog. I'm a wife/mama/friend/birth-choice advocate/Jesus follower/jokester/chef/activist/problem-solver, and maybe more...

And you?

More Rawness

2010-06-28T21:27:00.003+02:00

Yes, I am officially Ob. SESSED. with this raw food stuff. Yesterday I found two raw restaurants in our next city of residence (I'll have to wait six months to try them out, though... M - how about you go and give me a report?!), and I'm already creating wish lists in my head of gadgets to enhance this raw lifestyle. Fortunately, Christmas isn't for another half year, so I have some time to see if I can stick it out (and time to learn to be more creative with what I've got, assuming my blender doesn't give up on me)... Keith is ever the supporter, even up for all my raw meals and admiring my handiness with the stick blender. He supplements when necessary, or desired, but that's not as often as I was anticipating.

Here's what I ate today:
Breakfast:
Coffee w/ cream - not raw, but if I didn't have it I wouldn't survive long enough to have anything else
spinach-pear-banana-avocado smoothie

Lunch
cashew nut milk, banana, carob powder, cinnamon & cayenne shake
a few spoonfuls peanut butter (not raw) w/ honey (technically raw but not vegan since it comes from bees... interesting, no?)

Snack:
apple, carrot, 1/2 cucumber, red pepper

Dinner:
carrot, 1/4 cucumber, 1/2 yellow pepper w/ tahini dipping sauce
raspberry-banana-spinach-basil smoothie (delicious!)

Later I'll dig up some dates and Brazil nuts if I want something sweet...

I read something today that I found interesting: some people advise an 85% raw diet w/ 15% vegan to allow you to feel full (beans, whole grains) without relying on the fats that an exclusively raw diet requires (avocado, lots of nuts and seeds). Makes sense. I'm definitely eating lots of nuts and avocados.

Surprisingly, I don't find myself with lots of cravings. Today is also the first day that I've maintained this level of "rawness"... the past week or so I've done so for breakfast and lunch, and not as much for dinner. We have some planned grillings happening this week, so we'll see how the rest of the week goes. I don't have a specific plan other than eating lots of fruits and veggies whenever I can, and eating less dairy. I'm interested to see how this unfolds for us.

Smoothie Creations

2010-06-27T11:12:00.002+02:00

I've been playing around with my stick blender and on-hand produce and have discovered the following two combinations that were good enough to write down:

Kate's 1st Invention
1 green apple, cored & chopped
1 avocado
1 c frozen spinach
juice of one lemon
1 c cold water

Kate's 2nd Invention
2 handfuls baby spinach
1 avocado
1 pear, cored & chopped
a frozen banana
1 c cold water

Things I've discovered so far:
I definitely like my smoothies cold, not room-temp, so I use cold or frozen stuff when possible. I always let the tap run for a minute to get really cold water; I use a frozen banana, not a fresh one; and etc...

This week I've learned (from my raw books) that I can keep ripened avocados in the fridge for a while before they go bad (I always thought the fridge destroyed them - in my experience it made them stringy - but this doesn't seem to happen when they're at a good ripeness). I also learned that frozen vegetables are typically blanched before freezing, which leaches some of their nutrition out. So, while I used frozen spinach in the first recipe, I did so so as to have a frozen component, but probably won't make a habit out of it.

Those Suckers Are Sharp!

2010-06-27T11:09:00.002+02:00

The First Slaughter: a victim of Elijah's two teeth

Rawness

2010-06-25T16:59:00.002+02:00

For a while I've been intrigued with the Raw Diet, in which you only consume raw, or living, foods. Nothing cooked over 118 degrees (I've seen a bit of a temp range); no meat or dairy; basically, vegan on crack.

I'm mostly intrigued by the health benefits, which are something along the lines of "feed your body highly nutritional food so that it can spend less time digesting and more time healing itself" and "cooking destroys everything nutritional that exists in food". I'm not totally sold yet, but I"m definitely not going to argue with getting more fruits and veggies in my diet.

For my birthday Keith's mom got me some great raw recipe books I'd requested, found here. I definitely feel somewhat limited in what I can prepare since I'm without my food processor and blender and plethora of other kitchen tools here, and I'm relying solely on my cheap-o stick blender. But, I've been enjoying smoothies every day for breakfast and often throughout the day, which is a start. And, as I'm writing, I'm even soaking cashews so I can make my own nut milk. Weird, right?

At the very least, it's a whole new food frontier that I hadn't yet discovered, and I find it fascinating. I have some Boston friends that are indulging in the raw lifestyle (doesn't that sound swanky?) and they assured me - as we share an equal passion for delicious food - that raw food can, in fact, rival cooked.

I'm also about to dive into The China Study, which I expect to be a mind-boggling read. This will probably wreck havoc on our weekly grill nights...

Week 26 (give or take)

2010-06-24T13:39:00.004+02:00

No one is having a harder time believing that Elijah is six months already than me. How did this happen? Was permission granted? And so, he grows.

Two teeth have taken up residence front and center on his bottom gums. He'd been teasing us for a while with signs of teething - mainly drool, drool, and more drool - but when they actually came we almost missed it. The night before we left for Boston we could feel one through his gums. By the time we were air-bound I could see the little row of spikes emerging. I was quite surprised when a few days later the one next to it decided to join the fun. Elijah did great with teething, and only seemed to notice something happening for about a day and half during which time he lived with his shirt in his mouth and gnawed away.

He is rolling every which way, and about two seconds away from crawling. He puts his butt way up in the air with his face on the ground and the bulldozes forward. It gets him where he wants to go, albeit slowly. He is also sitting pretty well, though we tend to keep the pillows nearby for the times he decides to crash to the side or straight back. We spent half our time in Boston staying with dear little Judah, who, at 14 months, can move like nobody's business. I know what I'm in for once Elijah goes mobile!

Elijah and I play a little game together. He will make a clicking sound with his mouth and wait for me to make it back to him. We go back and forth for a while until he laughs and laughs and laughs like we've just witnessed an SNL skit from the mid-90s. I love love love the way we are learning to interact more and more. It is so neat to realize this being is an actual person, and not just a baby.

He is looking more and more to me like Keith and Keith's dad, and it's fun to finally be able to see some sort of resemblance of family in his face. Others have seen this from day one, for I guess for us parents it can take a little bit. I still claim his eyes, though, which seem to get noticed daily. I still can't get over the fact that I have a blue-eyed baby... Keith's eyes are so dark, I was sure they'd win out in the gene pool. Keith likes to point out that all my genes are dominant. Thanks, honey.

And so he grows and changes, yet he will always be my baby, the way my mom still calls me her baby and pats her lap, as if to invite me to curl up on it. He sleeps so peacefully beside me without a care in the world, and is happiest when he's in my arms. He actually smiles when I bring out the Ergo and snap it around my waist, and he is so content to take in the world from his place on my chest. I wouldn't have it any other way.

What I Think About... Co-Sleeping

2010-06-23T14:17:00.004+02:00

We've been co-sleeping with Elijah from his first day ex-utero. If you had asked me a couple years ago - even one year ago - if I would be co-sleeping and bed-sharing I would have said Hells to the No! One of our biggest To-Do's Before The Baby was to move, since we are living in a one-bedroom flat, and where on earth would our baby be sleeping? Try as we did, moving wasn't going to come easy or cheaply for us, so we finally resigned ourselves to staying where we were (and still are). We figured we'd squish a crib in somewhere, or at least a pack-n-play type deal.

Then I started reading, among other things, Dr. Sears. I first read The Birth Book for my doula course, and I loved how pro-natural birth he was without trying to crack people over the head with it. I knew other people that enjoyed his parenting books, so we picked up The Baby Book and found it to be similar; he presents several options and is certainly preferential towards the various AP choices all the while insisting that each parent, child, and family is different and there is no one size fits all.

Dr. Sears is certainly an advocate for co-sleeping and bed-sharing, something that has been traditionally taboo in our culture. There are certainly safe and unsafe ways to co-sleep, and also different ways to co-sleep (baby in the bed, in a co-sleeper, in a crib, or on some other separate surface from mom).

For us, co-sleeping originated out of our need - specifically that there was no other place to put a baby - but developed into something that I find encourages closeness, trust and bonding between us.

There are things that make co-sleeping the "easy" choice... Particularly in the beginning, when Elijah was eating so often, it was wonderful to only have to roll over to feed him instead of getting up out of bed to fetch him. I found that I would often wake moments before he started to stir, meaning that I was able to feed him before he even woke up. If I ever woke up in a panic, wondering if he was still breathing, all I had to do (and still do) is reach my hand to feel his gently lifting back. There are many other benefits of co-sleeping, but these were the most tangible for me.

And then, there are things that make co-sleeping the "hard" choice, particularly as Elijah grows older. Sometimes he wants to nurse simply because he knows I'm there. Sometimes he wriggles and puts his feet in less optimal places (like my ribs), and he often stirs when we come to bed for the night, mandating another little nursing session. I remember a particularly hard week around three months or so where it seemed Elijah wanted to eat all night, every night. At some ungodly hour I remember thinking I'd give anything for a crib and another room where I could just close the door and walk away.

As I thought about our situation more, I focused on two things that changed the way I thought about the hard times. One, this time is only for a short season. Sometime soon - be it next month or next year, or even two years from now [and somewhere Keith is reading this and thinking, "Two years? Over my dead body!"] Elijah will not sleep with us any more and I know that I will miss that, in part. Those weeks that seem so hard are also only for a time, and rarely extend past a few nights. The second thing I realized was that I ultimately chose to co-sleep and bed-share not because it was the easy option but because I truly believe that it is doing something good for the relationships in my family. I love that Elijah wakes up snuggled between mama and dad, and the first thing we see is his smiling face. I love that Keith is rarely disturbed by our night actions and that there is hardly ever crying. I love that I can nurse Elijah to sleep without having to transfer him from my arms to another surface. I love sleeping with my body curled around Elijah's while he nurses, and Keith's body close to mine. Has anyone coined the term The Family Spoon? I think that fits us perfectly.

Sunday Afternoon Nap [For One]

As we were just in Boston, it was just Elijah and me sleeping together, and it was a really special time for me. We both slept fabulously, even the nights we slept on the narrow surface of a couch.

I know co-sleeping and bed-sharing are not for every family, as nothing is. But I do think there tends to be a stigma against it and I definitely encourage anyone that is having difficulty and looking for another sleeping option to at least consider if co-sleeping could enhance your family's sleep.

Spring is here... sort of

2010-05-31T15:21:00.004+02:00

I don't know what the weather has been like in your neck of the woods, but here in Gothenburg it's been a bit slow in coming. Finally, FINALLY, in the past couple weeks the temps have stayed above 50, and this is often (oh, but certainly not always!) accompanied by a brightly shining sun. Today, in fact, it's damn near 70(!), along with sunshine. Not too shabby.

Last summer I remember stressing out about not being able to find the perfect pair of summer sandals that were both hard-working and beautiful. By August I realized I didn't need no open-toed shoe for the summer here, and this year June approaches with me in peace about my podiatric coverings.

Elijah loves going to the park (at least, I love going to the park and I just assume he likes as I do) so most afternoons we'll go for a stroll and at some point find ourselves sitting beneath a tree for a bit (re)discovering dandelions and leaves the feeling of grass between fingers and toes. Gothenburg is filled with lilacs again, so we always stop to smell them. I don't know if Elijah understands that lilacs and their scents are a good thing... he kind of scrunches up his face at them.

One thing I must lament about for just a moment (I swear!) is that extent of the lightness in our days here. The sky stays light until well near 11pm, which I'm okay with... it's the lightening of the sky before 4am that agitates me. I have - as Keith calls it - put our bedroom on lock down, using a combination of materials (heavy-duty aluminum foil and cardboard) to keep out the sun. Not only is this necessary for the early-morning hours, but pretty much any time that Elijah is trying to go to sleep.

Lamenting aside, I do love that our evenings are completely light, making it not seem like "the end of the day" when Keith comes home but infusing us with more of a "the night is young" sentiment. We have a semi-serious goal of grilling out once a week, something that last summer almost gave us grounds for divorce (not really, mom) (but, seriously). See, we always had high hopes for our grilling adventures but then something would inevitably go wrong: not enough charcoal, too windy for the disposable grill, bad sausages, etc... This year, Keith kicked off the season when Stephanie was visiting, so I could stay inside to "put Elijah to bed" while those two went out and did all the hard work. Now, thanks to practice and some tips from our grilling friends, Keith is a near-expert and I still get to stay inside to "put Elijah to bed". We combine grilling with guests, who inevitably get suckered into helping Keith, and voila!, I've just scored myself a delicious dinner.

What else, what else? In the near-ish future I kick off to Boston (Elijah, too) and Keith heads off to Korea (of the Southern variety only, please). I'm wildly excited, so much so that I am actually planning and organizing my social calendar this far in advance. And yes, I did have to go to ehow.com in order to know where to start.

In Loving Memory

2010-05-21T16:09:00.005+02:00

Yesterday our dear friend Andrew passed away. Two years ago he discovered he had colon cancer - a rather freakish occurrence in a 36-year old - and yesterday he moved on from a long, hard, fight.

Keith and I have each known Andrew for almost a decade, in many capacities: friend; pastor (who, along with his wife Val -also a pastor- married us); colleague, employer, mentor. I will always remember how real Andrew was with who he was, where he was at... Good day? You'd know it. Bad day? You'd know that, too.

Andrew has three incredible boys (in the picture above he's holding the ultrasound pics of his third), the oldest two of which I spent a good deal of time babysitting during college. He was married to his other half for almost 13 years.

I am grieved for his family that must learn new ways of existing without this amazing figure that has been an ever-present element in life as they know it. I am grieved that Andrew had to suffer as he did before dying. I am grieved for those that so fervently prayed and prayed and prayed, waiting for a miracle healing to occur and feel like they've been failed; or worse yet, that they failed.

For me, though, it's like this: Andrew's death IS the miracle. It's a miracle because no matter what he went through here on Earth, I know it is over now and he is in heaven, with Jesus. There is no reason that we should be entitled to something like Heaven and yet, there it is, awaiting us. Why? Because God is good. And that, too, is a miracle.

This is how I picture Andrew right now: He's wearing a soccer shirt with a ball in front of him, holding a Belgian beer in one hand, standing by the grill. It's a big grill, because, well, this is Heaven... which probably also means it's a big beer. He is smiling hugely, like in the picture above. I can hear him laughing, maybe even snorting, and having fun meeting everyone. He's a total connector, so in about a week's time he will have quadrupled everyone's social network, and he'll have all the newbies acclimated in no time. Because that's Andrew.

Five Months

2010-05-18T11:54:00.000+02:00

Elijah turned five months this weekend. I cannot believe that he is "so" old already. Each day we have more and more fun as he becomes more and more interactive. There's a whole lot of squealing going on, especially when he's sitting in his chair (like in the pictures) watching me in the kitchen. I'm hearing some actual syllables escape his mouth from time to time, like "haaaaaaaaaaaaaa", "bababababa" and "mamamamama"... so, so close to "mama", right?! (Don't worry, I'm not holding my breath for that one just yet.)

He loves books for their fun pictures, but even more so for their ability to be shoved into his mouth. In fact, pretty much anything he gets his hands on goes straight to his mouth, from his shirt to my shirt to my hair. He's rolling a lot now, which has me thinking through what needs to be moved from floor level to a safer holding spot.

He's officially done with all his 3-6 month clothes and is nicely filling in the 6-9 month ones (when he's wearing any - he much prefers to be nekkid). In Euro sizing he's embracing the 68s and some 74s as well. A little bit ago I went to one of these massive kids' stuff sales at a local school, where parents bring all the old stuff their kids aren't wearing or using anymore. It's pretty intense with all these moms elbow to elbow around these piles of clothes, holding their giant IKEA bag to put their loot in. Basic survival skills indicate that you should grab any and every piece of clothing that seems like a possibility, and you can always sort through your pile later. I got some good finds, particularly for summer. We'll be in Turkey for three weeks in July so I was thrilled to find some linen things to keep him cool.

Sitting... well, he's not quite sitting on his own, but he gets closer and closer each day. Right now he kind of leans way forward which more often than not induces a nice spit up session. Some days are totally fine, and some days he's like a hose with no faucet to turn off. It's always a bit overwhelming to be just dressed for the day - as Keith was this morning - and then to be ralphed on.

We'll need to be investing in a high chair one day soon. A few times while out at a cafe I've put him in one and he loves being up at the table, part of the action. He's also in full-time rolling mode now, no longer just an occasional partaker of the sport. He's even using his hands to help pull him over, say if he's turning towards his mobile he'll grab the mobile to help propel him onto his stomach.

ToT 2010 - Week One

2010-05-14T22:38:00.002+02:00

I've been treading for just over a week now, and it's been going great. I'm working out nearly every day, but the workouts are short enough that it feels manageable for me.

On weekdays that I run (usually Monday, Wednesday and Thursday), my goal is to get up early (for me) while Keith is still having male bonding time with Elijah. Otherwise, it waits until the evening when Keith comes home, and after Elijah is in bed. I also have a Saturday run, which is really flexible because, Hey!, it's Saturday.

In order to complete my 46-mile running goal, I've mapped a 1.5 mile route in order to spread it over 30 runs. It's short and sweet enough that I don't dread doing it several times a week.

I fiddled with my Jillian Michaels workouts a bit, but now I've got a routine. On days that I am running, I Shred, which takes right around 25 minutes. Easy peasy. On days that I'm not running, I do four circuits from one of the two other Jillian Michaels DVDs I have. It's a bit tougher and longer, so it keeps me on my toes.

If Elijah is awake, he's either content watching me jump all around form his Lay-Z Boy, or he's enthralled with his mobile. If he's sleeping, I use the geekiest accessory ever [the bluetooth] to make sure I'm not too loud.

Like I mentioned, I've scheduled all of my workouts with little check boxes next to them in my planner, and one of the most satisfying parts of my day is to put a little tick in the box[es] for that day.

I've had three other people join the KateIsFun team, so I'm only six people away from my goal of ten... care to join?

I've not raised any money yet, but I only sent out my support email this morning. (If you're interested in either of these ways to support ToT, see my previous post.)

And, since I also have a personal weight loss goal as well, I was thrilled to discover I'd lost 1.2 pounds the first week. Who knew that eating well and exercising actually IS the key?!

All in all, I've really enjoyed this first week of Treading, and I can't wait to see progress on all fronts in the weeks ahead.

Consider Yourself Officially Invited

2010-05-14T11:48:00.001+02:00

Dear Friends,

Some of you might remember a similar letter I sent out last year around this time, letting you know about my participation in an event called Tread on Trafficking. Tread on Trafficking is a fundraising event to raise money for Love146, a non-profit organization that works hard to fight sex trafficking worldwide. You may also recall that my involvement and support for the work Love146 does isn't just "something to do" but rather something that I am uniquely passionate about. This event carries a lot of purpose for me, and even more so for the people that it will be benefiting.

I invite you to be involved with me in one of two different ways:

The first way is to sponsor me directly. My exercise goal for this year is two-fold: to run a total of 46 miles, and to complete 46 workouts at home, between May 1 and June 30. Over the past week I've had a great start to my goal, and I've even scheduled every workout in my planner! (This means I'm serious, since I'm not at all this organized in everyday life!) My financial goal for this year is to personally raise $1162, which is a 10% increase of what I raised last year ($1056).

This year the event is allowing for TEAMS to fundraise, so I started a team called KateIsFun (this is my blog name, in case you didn't know). So, the second way that you could support me and Love146 is to join my team and raise money yourself through your own network of friends and family. My goal for my team is to have 10 people join and raise support (right now there are three of us), and my financial goal for the team is to raise $2500. I've found the Tread on Trafficking event to be not only a great cause but also a terrific impetus to get more active. If this sounds like something you'd like, I invite you to join the KateIsFun team.

Here are some links you might find useful:
Info on Love146
Info on Tread on Trafficking
My blog, where I'll be posting weekly updates of my and the team's progress
Where to JOIN MY TEAM (click the link, then at the top of the new page click "Join Our Team"
Where to SPONSOR ME

Thanks so much for considering sponsoring me or joining the KateIsFun team. If you have any questions feel free to email me (kateisfun [at] gmail [dot] com).

Cheers,
Kate

Dessert Alert!

2010-05-10T22:21:00.002+02:00

I'm off to bed in two shakes, but just had to do a quick rave about this Strawberry Rhubarb Crumble I made tonight from 101cookbooks. It was DELICIOUS, and super easy to whip up (in part due to my tweaks - see below):

I used a box of frozen strawberries
I didn't have spelt flour so I used rye
I didn't have pine nuts so I chopped up some Brazil nuts (and didn't toast 'em; I figured that would get done in the oven)
I didn't have port wine so I used the merlot I keep on hand for cooking (this is super low bar - it comes in a bag)
I only cooked for 30 minutes becuase I couldn't stand to wait; I definitely didn't let it cool for 20 minutes, either

I was really craving a scoop of vanilla on top, but had to make do with a dollop of creme fraiche (it was a wise choice).

Enjoy!

thoughts here and there

2010-05-07T18:37:00.003+02:00

So, day two of my TBOS regimen is going awesomely. I've shredded, I've ran, I shredded again; I'm recording my not overindulgent (nor restrictive!) eating; I've consumed water, water water. I skipped the beer when we grilled last night, and have spent ample time out of doors. I am liking my ability to be successful.

Don't be surprised if there are many and often whisperings of my progress, as that's what keeps me motivated. What keeps you motivated?

I am really excited. Today I bought a ticket for another trip to the States, this time to Boston, and in just over a month (or, as Stephanie put it, "four pounds from now"). It feels a bit indulgent since I was just Stateside, but a dear friend wanted to help with the ticket (thank you, dear friend) and I desperately wanted to see my Boston peeps. Yes, my peeps. Keith will be off to Korea for a conference and while I am hugely jealous of the large amounts of kimchee he will have at his disposal, I cannot wait to show off my little man and feel at home again.

I read various and wonderful parenting/lactivist/feminist/etc... blogs and more often than I'd like (which is ever) I come across a report of some woman who was harassed while breastfeeding her child in public. Even more disturbing than the fact that this is considered something to harass are the comments from people that must have been clothed in ignorance for their entire lives... things like "I hate it when mothers whip out their breasts like bottles" and "I don't want my child seeing some woman doing THAT"... Seriously, people? Seriously?

I have more thoughts rumbling around in here, but it's time to go eat some Serbian cheese pie.

Two BIrds, One Stone

2010-05-06T10:30:00.000+02:00

Before I realized it was time for the 2nd Annual Tread on Trafficking marathon to begin, I decided it was time that I kicked it into high-gear to lose the last four pounds of baby weight that's been keeping me company for a while. I brainstormed with Keith and Auntie Stephanie about how to do this and how to stay motivated. Both had great suggestions for me, not to mention the few I came up with myself, so this is my lose-those-four-pounds-in-four-weeks plan:

Use a combination of my Jillian Michaels DVDs and running six times a week
Up my water intake to at least 2 liters a day (which I should be doing anyway with all this breastfeeding happening around these parts) and cut out alcohol
Portion control, particularly with anything rich
Avoiding outings to restaurants offering dessert buffets (which is too bad because Stephanie and I discovered a most delicious one the other day.... mmmmm....)
Keep a written food diary
Spend 2-3 hours outside every day

So, I also combined this with my goals for the Tread on Trafficking fundraiser which are:

**do 46 workouts with Jillian Michaels
**run 46 miles

(playing of of Love146) between now and June 30 (when the fundraiser ends). This morning I whipped out my PAA (that would be personal analog assistant, thank you Stephanie) and actually scheduled all 46 Jillian workouts and all 46 miles (broken into 30 - 1.5 mile runs) in writing on my calendar. Right now I feel really excited and a little nervous about the undertaking, since it's definitely up a notch or two from what I've been doing as of late.

By the way, my financial goals for Tread on Trafficking is to personally raise $1162 (10% more than I raised last year) and for the KateIsFun team to raise $2500.

And there you have it, my Two Birds, One Stone plan to help defeat sex slavery and get a bit healthier.

Don't forget! You can join the KateIsFun Fundraising team for Tread on Trafficking here, or you can sponsor me in my fundraising efforts here.

Join the KateIsFun Tread on TraffickingTeam!

2010-05-05T23:09:00.003+02:00

I am really excited because it is time for the 2010 Tread on Trafficking fundraiser. If you remember my posts from last year, you know that I raised $1056 for Love146.org, a terrific organization that works to end the gruesome trade of sex slavery that is far more present than people realize.

This year, what had been a local fundraiser has gone national (or, dare I say international since I am, after all, in Sweden), and with that comes the advent of TEAMS. So, I created a KateIsFun fundraising team, and I hope that I can convince nine others (or more!) to join me and help raise far more money than I could on my own.

If this sounds like something you'd like to be a part of, GREAT! You can join my team here. (Details should be self-explanatory, but leave a comment or email me at kateisfun [at] gmail [dot] com if you have specific questions.)

If you're feeling less like being an active participant but would still love to support this cause, than I invite you to sponsor me as I exercise my little heart out over the next two months. I am still thinking through my specific goals, but will post them soon. To sponsor me, go here.

I am really excited about this year's Tread on Trafficking, particularly that it has gone national. There are already many, many teams that have signed up, and I can't wait to see how many people participate to raise a buttload - yes, a buttload! - of money to crucify sex slavery.

Four and a half months

2010-05-05T09:43:00.003+02:00

Elijah has been having a most fabulous time with his Auntie Stephanie the past week and a half. She does all the things that aunties are supposed to do... she brought along a djembe from Ghana for Elijah to bang on, she's adorned him with millions of kisses, introduced him to fabulous music, and so much more. If we're lucky, tonight she might even serve as his first real babysitter so Keith and I can have a date.

Elijah had a check-up earlier this week and he's weighing in at 6080 g / 17.75 lbs, and measures almost 68 cm / 26.75 in. In the pictures he's wearing his nine month size Osh Goshes, which I had to bust out this week since his smaller ones no longer fit. His hair seems to ever slowly be appearing, although primarily in a wide mohawk strip down the middle of his head. After a brief respite, his teeth seem to be on the move again as tell-tale signs like ear-tugging and gnawing are back in full swing. We're still waiting, however, for the first little pointy bit to bust through those gums.

Elijah is going toe-crazy these days, pulling them closer and closer to his mouth each day it seems. He even went for MY toes the other night, but I had to draw the line. Soon we'll need to pick up a highchair for him, as he's moving closer and closer towards sitting. While out last week with Stephanie we placed him in one while eating lunch at a cafe. He did really well and it's wild for me to imagine that he's at this point already.

Month Four

2010-04-25T19:04:00.001+02:00

Elijah is just over four months old and is growing and changing at astounding rates that are way too fast for this mama. Here he is modeling his head control and upper body strength. He's also mastered the art of Pulling Off Socks and if you ever run out water you can bottle up Elijah's drool and use it to wash your dishes because there is that much of it.

He's now been on nine airplanes, including two trans-Atlantic flights and this is, according to Keith, more than Keith had experienced before the age of 22. We just returned from a somewhat spur-of-the-moment trip to the US, in which he made loads of new friends. His two grandmothers went totally gaga over him, so Keith and I joke that we are now only his third and fourth biggest fans. He also got to meet his great-grandparents on my side, which was really an amazing thing to be apart of.

He handled jet lag really well, basically sleeping the majority of the 24 hours after landing, and then pretty quickly coming back to a pretty regular schedule (only to be tossed back across the Atlantic a few days later). He hasn't been much of a car rider (since we, you know, don't have one), but seemed to mostly enjoy the tons of riding he did State-side. Despite rolling quite regularly a few weeks ago, he seems to have put that skill on hold for the moment.

We haven't had an official weigh-in in a while, although our scale would suggest he's around the 18-pound mark. All our friends with older babies remark how small Elijah is in comparison, which is so funny to us as the only way we measure is that he's bigger than he was before. But, it's so fun to look forward to all the ways he'll grow and change - quickly!- in the coming months.

Birth Review: Jim and Pam on The Office

2010-03-29T11:29:00.004+02:00

You know who Jim and Pam are, right?

A few weeks ago on The Office, Pam gave birth to her first child, daughter Cecelia. As a huge fan of the show I was obviously excited for this culmination of the office flirtation story line that's been sucking us in for years (have you noticed how Erin and Andy have totally taken front stage since then? I'm not too into that, but anyways...). I was also curious as to how the writers would chose to portray the birth. Would it be hours and hours of screaming, with shots of Pam pushing in the lithotomy position? Would it be a non-event with Pam so pumped full of drugs that she appeared as if she could have just as easily been sipping a piña colada through an umbrella straw in the Caribbean as opposed to pushing a human head out of her hoo-hah?

Pam does a fair bit of laboring while at work. AT WORK! While I can understand having contractions while going about daily life, I cannot for the life of me imagine enduring two-minute-apart contractions anywhere other than in the privacy of my own home. But hey, I'm no Pam.

In the end, they didn't actually show too much of the birth itself. We know that she was in labor at the hospital for about 19 hours, and we could here her pushing and making a fair bit of noise from outside the room. Seems rather reasonable to me, especially since I did my own fair bit of noise-making with Elijah. While they don't indicate whether or not she had an epidural or any other drugs, that fact that she was obviously very in touch with what her body was feeling leads me to give her the benefit of the doubt and think that she went au naturel. Go, Pam!

What got me a bit worked up was the way Pam's efforts to breastfeed were thwarted by her nurse. When Pam is having trouble getting Cecelia to latch, the nurse offers to take her to the nursery for a while, and give her a bottle. In fact, her exact words are, "Bottles are fine. Lots of babies grow up using bottles!" Pam, smart whip that she is, declines, saying that she's read about nipple confusion. The nurse makes a sarcastic reply about parents who "know everything."

Obviously that was meant to be funny. But in reality, there are so many women that give up on breastfeeding because they are offered a bottle or given free formula or given some other out when things are hard. I don't say this to fault women, but I do fault the systems that are in place, supposedly to help, but that actually do damage. We don't need bottles offered, formula given, or shaming looks cast upon women trying to breastfeed; we need more - and better - lactation consultants, support groups, and resources** for women before birth. Women need to know that it is common - in fact, perhaps even probable - to run into issues with breastfeeding. But, women also need to know that there are workable solutions for almost every issue encountered. Women need to be empowered to keep with breastfeeding, not shown a map to the formula isle and handed Similac coupons on the way.

Oh, and the male lactation consultant - I don't mean to discriminate but... do those even exist?

My grade for the birth portion of The Office is a B; it neither did damage to one's impression of birth, nor did it explicitly encourage natural birth practices. My grade for the follow-up care is a D, since it was only Pam's initiative that saved her breastfeeding relationship with her daughter.

**My favorite portable breastfeeding resource: The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding

Week 14

2010-03-25T13:30:00.002+01:00

Sorry for the delay, but I've just returned from a almost internet-free week in York. Blissful in some ways, you know?

So yes, the obvious: Week 14 brought Elijah's first plane rides, first travel in another country (outside the womb, of course), and first nights in a new bed. He found our room in the cottage most fascinating, particularly the light fixture on the ceiling. Saturday evening we went out to a most wonderful dinner with our friends, something I was insanely nervous about since it was going to be after his bedtime and I know how he gets when he's tired. But, miracle of miracles, the little guy slept the whole time. I can't tell you exactly how long it was in hours, but in courses he lasted through the scallops, the duck, the mousse, the wine and the cocktail. Bravo, little man, bravo! Elijah also got to appreciate the art of French driving as we took the shuttle bus between terminals at CDG on our way home; I'm pretty sure he got the take-home message as he promptly spit up on me during the ride. He was a most fabulous travel companion, only disturbing our fellow passengers a time or two with his cries (which is more than I can say for myself).

Elijah is also officially rolling over now, from back to front, and finding himself quite frustrated at not being able to go the other way. This means we are starting to think about how to save ourselves from his mobility, particularly in regards to sleeping on a bed; we'd previously moved our mattress down to the floor, but not so easy to do when traveling.

Elijah is also super responsive to different toys or songs that he's now familiar with... in the mornings, after he and Keith have been up for an hour or two, Elijah is ready to nap again, so Keith brings him in to me and we sleep together for a bit. When I wake up, I'll gently wake Elijah up with nursing and "This little piggy went to the market..." and "Here comes the mouse-y up to the house-y where ELIJAH lives!" Man, I feel super cheesy typing out those rhymes, but Elijah goes nuts.

His honks are slowly turning into giggles, but he still loves it most when we are laughing back and forth with him. He is drawn to writing, like signs on the table at a restaurant or a wall with script on it. Of course, he also seems to enjoy staring at completely blank walls so perhaps this is just coincidence.

Week 13 / Month Three

2010-03-17T15:28:00.003+01:00

Yesterday Elijah turned three months old. We celebrated with chocolate muffins and chocolate ice cream, Keith and I making sure to eat Elijah's portion so as not to waste. While it's hard to believe that three months have gone by so very quickly, it's also hard to believe that this is the same baby that came out. When I look at pictures of Elijah moments after birth, he looks completely different from who he is now. Oh, how fast they grow!

This week Elijah has been "standing" a ton while we hold his hands. Sometimes it's just for a moment but sometimes it's for quite a while. His legs are getting super strong and chunky... all the better to nibble on.

He's also practicing his laugh which is more like a honk. If I laugh, then he'll honk back:

Me: ha ha ha!
Elijah: honk!
Me: ha ha hee he ha!
Elijah: Honk! HONK!

It's rather amusing.

Elijah is becoming more and more enthralled with the world around him, which is wrecking havoc on nap time. It used to be that the second we walked out the door with him in the Ergo he was out, and he'd sleep the day away while I ran errands. Now he's all, "Tree! Bird! Car! Car! Car! Tree!," and so on, which is making both of us a bit more cranky at times. I think I'll have to start being a bit more intentional with nap time and see if that does the trick.

Reflections on our homebirth (part IV): Birth Attendants

2010-03-12T14:53:00.001+01:00

**Edited To Add**
A while back I said I was weighing whether or not to have a doula present in addition to my two midwives. In the end I decided against it since the midwives were 100% devoted to me, and me only, during the birth. Had there been only one midwife, or had I been in a setting where my birth attendants wouldn't have been with me constantly, as mine were, I absolutely would have had a doula present. At no time during my birth was I afraid or worried. However, there were moments where I asked, "is this normal?", and had someone not been there who knew exactly what was happening and why I think it would have been easier to feel fearful. Fear, it turns out, is not a welcome guest during labor. For Keith, the most significant positive factor about homebirth is the fact that there were two women completely, totally attentive to me the entire time. He knew this was supportive to me, and I think it was supportive to him as well. For more info on the scientifically proven benefits of having a doula present at your birth, I highly recommend The Doula Book.

One of the best things a woman can do to increase her chances of having her birth go the way she desires is to choose her birth attendant carefully. My birth attendants were two midwives that each work in the local hospitals as midwives, and choose to participate in homebirth on the side. A rather nice hobby, if you ask me.

Before Keith and I definitively decided on homebirth, we had a lengthy meeting with our midwives, going through an epic list of questions. For Keith, the questions primarily surrounded the issue of safety... What equipment would they bring with them? How long to transfer to the hospital? How do we get there? What could occur that would require a transfer?

For me, I was mostly concerned with issues that had the potential to interfere with my choices in, and control of, the birth. The word control often has such negative connotations... things that come to mind are controlling personalities and power struggles. But in birth, such a huge amount of surrender is required of the woman to actually give birth that having control over things that are control-able is crucial. What was important to me was that that things wouldn't be done TO me or decided FOR me; instead, that I, myself would chose to have a specific measure taken (or not); that I would know exactly what was going to happen to me and my baby.

Interviewing these midwives gave me the opportunity to see if my desires were compatible with their protocol. While I have a right to want and need certain things to be my way, birth attendants need to be able to practice in a way that they are comfortable with, as well. I think this interviewing step is crucial, and serves both parties equally to reveal their compatibility.

Two Johannas & A Kate: Waiting

I am completely thrilled that my midwives were the ones that were with us as I birthed Elijah. They were everything I needed them to be and nothing I didn't. They played together amazingly as a team, and I only learned afterward that they had never co-attended a birth before.

We had been in touch by phone the previous day and days, especially since my estimated due date was starting to gather dust, and I was wondering if Elijah would ever be gracing us with his presence. Despite my apprehension that I would go past two weeks (at which point I would be considered "high risk" and unable to birth at home with these midwives, per their protocol), they assured me that everything would work out beautifully.

Throughout the birth they completely respected my desires and spoke to me as a competent, knowledgeable woman capable of making decisions, like when I declined to be checked internally until well into labor (any internal checks can increase the chance of infection, and routine checks do not actually give valuable information; sure, you will know how much you are dilated, but this means nothing in terms of how long until you will actually birth). At the same time, they did not hold back from saying things that were important, like when I had been in the tub for quite a bit and seemed to be losing focus, both mentally and physically; they suggested then that I might want to get out and change positions keep things moving.

While the chances of this happening are extremely slim at this point, I would love to birth all my children with these two midwives. As Karen Angstadt said over at Intentional Birth in this post, "I want my birth to be part of someone's passion." And for Elijah's birth, this was totally the case, x2.

Vegetable Week

2010-03-11T20:02:00.002+01:00

While Keith was away I ate a lot of sugar. A LOT of sugar. I went out a lot to cafes and along with my latte, which looked so lonely there by itself... lonely, like me... [ahem] I would get some delectable pastry to keep me - er, it - company. And, of course, it's semlor season, and ever since learning how to make them myself, there's been a steady supply of mandelmassa and cream in the fridge. And then, well, it's always chocolate season, isn't it, so I found myself gnawing on the bars of chocolate I had supposedly bought for baking purposes. It's just so much more efficient to just take out the middle man, you know?

And Keith, having been away for 11 days, was kind of sick of heavy food, having been restaurant-dependent for most of his time away.

So, this week, we've been eating pretty healthily. I've saliently declared my goal to eat as many vegetables and fruits as I can, and I must say I'm kicking butt. We did a big grocery run on Saturday, and I've replenished our produce drawer three times since then.

In no particular order, here are some of the things I've been enjoying:

Deconstructed Sushi Bowl - and when I ran out of tofu I used some baked salmon I had in the fridge; also used leek instead of the green onions

Oatmeal made w/ soy milk, coconut flakes and banana

Blood Oranges - why have I never had these before?!

celery w/ peanut butter (I'm out of raisins otherwise I'd have bona fide Ants On A Log)

lentil soup

baby arugula w/ cherry tomatoes, chopped parsley, organic feta, and a splash of either balsamic vinegar or fresh lemon juice

Grated Granny Smith and carrots w/ chopped celery and walnuts

shredded cabbage w/ peanuts and a homemade Thai dressing

dried apricots w/ almonds or Brazil nuts

roasted broccoli and cauliflower w/ garlic

roasted garlic - On Saturday afternoon Keith made three big heads of this, and we devoured it in about an hour; we smelled for days

ginger stir-fry

I'm on the look-out for delicious and new recipes, so if you've got something you love send it my way.

Week 12

2010-03-10T19:04:00.004+01:00

I'm sure some pretty important things happened developmentally this week, but the biggest thing that stands out is that Elijah peed on his head. Twice. I've been trying to air out his bidness daily, and this is basically a recipe to increase your laundry needs. He also - quite skillfully - managed to aim through a quarter-sized hole on his mobile, which landed the projectile stream on the carpet. If he can only be this accurate at Skee Ball one day, I'll be so proud.

Oh, yes. Elijah taught me a lesson in forgiveness this week. Boy, is that guy smart. We were out for the day, and somehow I ended up going seven hours without changing his diaper. I KNOW. I feel horrible. By the time we were on the bus home he was really fussy, and by the time we were walking home from the bus he was crying. Obviously, as soon as I walked in the door I changed him, and he had leaked through and must have been cold on the way home. He was crying so much that I didn't even dress him, just immediately nursed him. He was a bit distraught at first, and then became quiet; I was convinced he was pissed and thus giving me the silent treatment. But, when he was done nursing he just started smiling and giggling, as if his butt hadn't just been totally neglected for the better part of the day, making him miserable. He had a need, it was addressed, and that was enough. Just like that, he was over it. On to the next thing, and then the next. It made me think how great it would be if I would do this in my life... stop dwelling on things that were hard, or sucked, and moved on to the next positive thing.

I've been playing around with his sleep habits a bit, mainly so that I can more consistently sleep on my back instead of with my chest attached to his face. Tonight I nursed him outside the bedroom, and then put him down while he was still awake. And now - HE IS ASLEEP. HE DID IT BY HIMSELF. I'M REALLY HAPPY ABOUT THIS. I'm extremely sensitive to his cries (isn't every mother?), and whenever I hear him (say, while he's napping or in the evenings when Keith and I are watching a movie or something) I immediately go in to him. I've been really consistent with this, and my hope is that he "knows" that if he needs anything his mama is there, thus giving him the security to be on his own.

Of course, Murphy's Law says that since I've publicly declared a positive trend in my child's sleep habits, he will never again put himself to sleep until he's five.

Today was another first: The Movies. The theatres in town offer Barnvagn Bio, where movies are shown with slightly-less-than-normal dimmed lights, lowered sound, and the expectation that babies will cry through-out. Of course, the showtime is 10:30 on Wednesday mornings, so it's not likely that any other theatre goers will feel infringed upon and demand their money back. We saw "It's Complicated" which I found rather charming, although I'm pretty sure that I didn't need to see Alec Baldwin without his shirt on... makes me hope that Jack Donaghy and Liz Lemon never get it on.

shootin' the breeze

2010-03-07T19:57:00.003+01:00

I've been craving the outdoors lately which makes me think I'm turning into a real Swede. Could it be? The Swedes are always outside (aren't you?!). But - you say - isn't the weather bad sometimes? The wind, the rain, the snow?! I think that's the point: if they waited for the weather to be nice, they would never go outside.

There's a saying here (I think I've mentioned it before), there's no bad weather, only bad clothes. Indeed.

We know a couple from Australia who's 4-year-old goes to pre-school. He came home from school one day lamenting the fact that he had to play outside in the rain. But hey, it's Sweden! That's what they do here.

On the other hand, I have a Swedish friend who's kids go to a school where they are outside ALL. THE. TIME. I believe that they even sleep under some sort of awning or something.

So anyway, I've been craving the outdoors. Gothenburg is a beautiful city, especially when cast against the brilliant blue sky that's been showing up here and there this past week. I have a plan to take the bus over to Hsingen (across the river), and take the ferry back (also, as you may have guessed, across the river), taking pictures along the way. There seem to be so many brightly colored buildings along that journey, and I want to capture them. I'll share my results here, okay?

Our temps are finally heating up, even going above zero these past few days. Keep in mind that A) that our temps are Celsius and B) that we've spent weeks at a time around -10, or lower... That makes zero seem positively bikini-worthy.

Keith and I went on a couple walks this weekend, yesterday to the big grocery store and today downtown for a late lunch. Keith did not wear his bikini. Next time. This coming week looks promising as well, so I hope to be out and about lots and lots with Elijah.

Week 11

2010-03-03T08:34:00.001+01:00

The boy grows! At our appointment on Monday Elijah weighed in at 6265g / 13#13oz and measured 64cm / 25.2in. He's no longer the newborn the weighs little more than an angel, assuring the holder that he was sent straight from heaven. Oh, no. Now he's hefty like a bag of flour and while of course he's still my angel it's more like holding an angel and his whole angel posse, like a Verizon Network-sized posse. While this picture doesn't show it so well, his hair is starting to come in even more (except for the bald line across the back of his head). It really changes the way he looks.

I am trying to read his cues for things more and more, and it seems to be working. For instance, he's pretty much settled on a 6pm bedtime which is great. I am trying to do more of a bedtime routine so that he is calm before the lights go out. Instead of starting the routine at a set time, as I had been doing, I figured that we both enjoy it a lot more if, at the first sign of his tiredness - a yawn, a squawk, a glazed glance, I start right away. Then, we avoid the Putting PJ's On a Screaming Octopus and instead opt for Putting PJ's On An Octopus. Happy Baby, Happy Mama.

Yesterday we had a first when he fell asleep completely on his own for his nap. He was playing under the mobile, and all of a sudden it got extremely quiet. When I looked over he looked like he was in a coma with his eyes open. When I said his name he was a bit startled, and briefly went back to batting at the toys above him, as if I had caught him doing something he shouldn't be doing. A few minutes later, however, he was totally out. As I type, I'm waiting for this to happen again...

He continues to be more and more vocal, squealing and squawking really excitedly. It's so fun to be able to talk to each other throughout the day.

One of my favorite moments of the day is each morning when he wakes up. Rather, it's when I wake up, since he's usually up long before me. When I look at him in the almost dark, he grins a huge smile back at me as if to say, "Thanks for joining the party, finally!" He just lays there and wriggles, smiling so big as if his sheer existence is the best gift ever. And, it is.

passing the time

2010-02-27T22:10:00.000+01:00

A week's worth of 6am mornings after spotty sleep with no reprieve will take it's toll, be assured. Kudos to any single parents out there for whom this is a way of life and not a deviation from the norm.

In all respects we are doing quite well. I haven't had to ground Elijah for misbehaving, and he hasn't screamed that he hates me, how could I do this to him, blah blah blah. We're both getting fed, although the quality of his meals is far more consistent than the quality of mine. He's been going to sleep pretty well in the evenings, although his daytime nap habits remain a bit of a mystery. I'm pretty sure there's an arcana for the art of baby sleeping, and I'm also sure that it will never be revealed in this world.

I've become a little obsessed with baby clothes lately. Example: When we were in Stockholm last week I went here, the source of Sweden's well-dressed child, and saw they had their amazing snow suits on sale. I went back and forth and back and forth [repeat] for forty-five minutes trying to decide A) if a black jacket and navy pants would be perceived as edgy or simply evidence of a color-blind parent, and B) if I was confident enough in knowing what I thought would be Elijah's size next winter to shell out the dough for said mismatched apparel. I decided against it finally, but then spent all week obsessing about it, and so visited one of the Gothenburg locales several times. Then, I went to my favorite kids' second-hand store (only the clothes are second-hand; all the kids have two hands but no exchanging allowed) and found exactly the coat I was looking for, for a steal. So I then headed back to the real store, to see if they could track down the right pants in the right size, which they did and I picked up today. So, I am now the proud owner of a fabulous snowsuit that will fit my son in one or maybe two years. WHY?

By the time Keith gets back, I may have clothes for the whole family for the next decade.

Week 10.5

2010-02-26T22:09:00.000+01:00

I was looking forward to blogging tonight but I'm too tired to be coherent, much less clever. So instead, I present to you Elijah in the infant-sized equivalent of a Lay-Z-Boy. Isn't he yummy?

Week 10

2010-02-24T10:31:00.002+01:00

A couple things to note: 1) I have not entirely mastered the "sling hold" with the wrap yet... but I'm getting closer. 2) Notice the band of bald on Elijah's head. He hasn't lost any of his "birth hair", except for the patch that's rubbed off because he turns his head from side to side while lying down. 3) That wall is embarrassingly bare; I'm wanting to hang a gorgeous baby quilt from Auntie Christie there, but haven't gotten around to it yet.

This morning when we woke up Elijah looked at me with a boy face. Not a baby face, but BOY face.

He continues to gnaw on his fingers pretty non-stop, with lots of glistening slobber adorning him and me. It makes me wonder if this is the beginning of teething, but it's mad early for that (right?), and it's not accompanied by any fussing, so I guess those long fingers are simply his new favorite toy.

He is using his legs so much these days, especially when we hold him upright and his feet are close enough to our laps to "stand". I remember feeling his calves when he was just born, and there was absolutely zero muscle tone; all fat! Now, though, I can feel when he tenses his muscles and the progression is impressive! I guess milk, sleep, and hugs really are fructuous to a baby's journey.

Also happening this week: Elijah's first night(s) away from dad, as Keith travels for a bit. As suspected, I'm not sure Elijah has noticed this absence yet, although Keith sure has. But if Keith were the one with the milk things would be in chaos, that I know.

A couple times this week I've gone out to eat at a cafe. It works perfectly because as soon as I put Elijah in the Ergo and we go out, he falls asleep. At the cafe, I bring a chair close to the one I'm sitting on, and lay Elijah's upper body on that one, with is legs resting in my lap. I know that once he's mobile it will be an entirely different beast to figure out, but I like this for now.

And finally, I've added some baby massage into the pre-bed happenings, and Elijah seems to like it, at least in part. He really loves the leg massage, and seems just a bit wary of the chest and arms part. I am wanting to do it every night and I think with consistency he'll like it more and more.

Now... where's MY pre-bed massage?

Somewhere on the spectrum between surviving and thriving

2010-02-23T11:18:00.002+01:00

Keith is away for what is turning out to be quite a while, with very good reason of course, and Elijah and I are holding down the fort. It is going okay, as the post suggests, although not awesome, which is due in equal part to the frigid temperatures and a cold that came to visit me this weekend. But, I just found my nasal spray from last season which promises to dry out my nose at least temporarily, and the five-day forecast promises that Friday will be above zero - finally! - if not accompanied by a little rain.

Yesterday I felt like an earth-mama-goddess, wearing my baby, baking, and organizing myself to take on the world! I even used Spotify to listen to Enya all night.

This morning, with my stuffiness a bit more present, the cold temps still cold, and a load of diapers with my name on it (remember - Keith usually does the gross part), I was feeling a bit less... empowered.

I debating whether or not to go to Baby Song Time today at our church. Elijah and I haven't been out since Saturday, so the fresh air would, I'm sure, do both of us some good. On the other hand, I really just want to go shopping and cafe-ing.

Yesterday I made a list of things I want to accomplish daily. This list has things like "Elijah's Bedtime Routine" because it's something I want to get in the habit of doing instead of our usual lack of routine which looks something like nothing. The list also has thing on it such as "brush teeth 2x day" (because honestly, I only brush once because we have a Sonicare and as we don't have dental coverage I'm starting to rethink this) and "eat three meals a day". Yesterday, sadly, I did not eat dinner.

Whenever Keith and I are away from each other, the person that is left at home usually devolves into some sort of timeless hermit, losing sense of order and purpose, and finds him- or herself sleeping till noon, watching Arrested Development until 3am, and eating bag after bag of chips. Sure, this sounds awesome, and if we were in college it would be. But, as we are, in general, near-functioning adults, it's a little embarrassing.

So, this time, mostly because I would hate to set such a poor example for my son, I decided that having order is the way to go.

We'll see how it goes...

Our Trip To Stockholm*

2010-02-19T11:54:00.004+01:00

*subtitled, Why I REALLY Hate Disposable Diapers

Yesterday we pilgrimaged to Stockholm to claim Elijah's birthright to American Citizenship. Required Elements: Both Parents. Baby. BUTTLOADS of Paperwork. Check, Check, CHEEEE-WTF?!-EECK.

The day started offensively early with the alarm going off at 4:30am. The good news is that it was exceptionally easy for me to get out of bed since I was awake nursing Elijah since 4am. The bad news is that I was awake at 4am.

We got it together and made the tram to Central Station, then caught the superbadass X2000 at 6am. DESTINATION: STOCKHOLM.

This train is crazy. It goes from Gothenburg to Stockholm - roughly 400 kilometers - in two and a half hours. It goes so fast that it rocks back and forth like a crazy person and causes SOME PEOPLE to require motion sickness gum so they don't ralf on the train like last time. I am not naming names, but this person is not me.

Unfortunately, because of snow we had to take an alternate route and we ended up arriving a half hour late. The bad news: we were almost late for our embassy appointment. The good news: this left more time for Elijah to crap through two outfits because we decided to use disposable diapers so we didn't have to drag dirty diapers all throughout the city but instead we just dragged dirty clothes all through the city and I was reduced to stealing diapers from the toy store.

Oh wait, this is Bad News, too.

So, we have some disposable diapers that a friend gave us when her son outgrew them. And, as I've said before, while I love cloth diapers I am not so hard-lined as to reject the alternative should there be a situation that warrants them. Yesterday APPEARED to be one of those days. The problem is that these diapers suck.

Admittedly, part of the problem may have been that Elijah was pushing the weight limit of these OFF-BRAND TERRIBLE diapers. He's 5.7kg and these poop out (har har) at 6kg. Not once, but twice, before we even get off the train, Elijah's crap can be found in places it does not belong. So, at 9:20am, he is already wearing the final outfit we have brought, which happen to be the pajamas he's supposed to wear that night. Seeing as it's three hours down, eleven more to go for our travel adventure, things were not looking good.

We make it to the embassy, do our thing, and leave. Next mission: FIND DIAPERS. We head back into the part of the city that has not been featured in spy movies, and look around for a grocery store or something of the sort where diapers can be purchased. Then I got side-tracked from our Very Important Mission by the sighting of a well-known, Swedish-brand toy store (I'm afraid to name it in case the company's web crawlers find this post and try to imprison me for what I'm about to tell you). We go in and look around, although by well-known I mean expensive, and we don't actually have plans to purchase anything. As we're on our way out I decide to ask them for a nearby place with diapers. The kind lady says that if it's an emergency, we are welcome to use their diapers and changing table, in the bathroom. Emergency? Well, hells yeah, it's an emergency! With eight hours to go and one outfit left before the puffy snowsuit qualifies as an outfit, I'm surprised we hadn't called 911 yet; diaper, please!

There's this whole drawer-ful of diapers, and just one - no wait, two! - are screaming out, desperate to become part of our diaper bag stash, not to mention the one already attached to my son's butt, shielding his pajamas from further assault. And so, with much shame and fear, I grab a couple extra diapers and squash them into my coat pocket, knowing I'll be glad I did later. And I was.

To pay penance, I scanned the toy shelf again, picked out the cheapest toy - a fabulously designed rattle, in black - and bought it.

So, all was well and good, all leaking orifices of the Tyo Family contained. We made our way over to Gamlastan (or, Stanlagam, as Keith likes to call it), looking for the perfect Thursday Lunch - Pea Soup w/ pancakes and Lingon Berry Jam. This is eaten in Sweden on Thursdays, for reasons I do not remember. But, it good, and what more reason is needed?

We finally find a place. It's nice. Almost too nice. It's certainly not of the buffet variety (which is what we Americans thrive on, right?) but it will do. Turns out, inside it's candle-lit and it looks like the type of place where one might meet his lover for a midday rendezvous. It reminds me of the inn we'll go to for dinner with my parents on occasion, that has as sign posted that actually reads "For the discretion of our customers, no photography is allowed." Which has the affect of making me assume that everyone there that is not at our table is involved in some torrid affair, and I wouldn't be surprised to see the maître d’ accused of being a home-wrecker on an episode of SJR.

Anyway. Lunch is delicious, and Elijah does great. Afterward, Keith goes to the bathroom and I breastfeed Elijah. My arm is resting on Elijah, and at some point I feel something wet.

Something like...

Poop.

Keith comes back, and instead of my usual "Everything come out ok?" (a mildly amusing joke from our first date that refuses to die) I say, as calmly as possible, "Don't sit down." Keith looks at me oddly, and I repeat. "Don't sit down." I show him IT, the poo, and hand him our son.

We call a brief meeting of the poop committee, and decide that, if we are very, VERY, careful, we can get away with re-using the pajamas is the diaper is successfully changed. Since I managed the situations on the train (remember - crazy train, going back and forth, which pretty much tossed me from side to side against the bathroom walls like a Nerf ball), it's Keith's turn. Keith takes Elijah and the diaper bag to the bathroom. I sit for what seems like ages, when Keith returns, asking where the size three diapers are. Turns out, I never put them in the diaper bag after stuffing them into my pocket. Crap! (har har)

Keith goes back to the bathroom again, with a new diaper, and works his magic. When he comes back, he has been... successful! PJs are still viable (mostly), and Elijah seems happy.

After lunch our plan was to explore the modern art museum, but it was freezing, and snowing, and we didn't have quite enough time for it to be enjoyable. So you know what we opted for?

The mall.

I went into the same stores that I was in earlier this week, except that they were in Gothenburg. Keith sat on a bench with our bags and child, and almost fell asleep. At one point we got up to do some shopping together, and ended up sitting down on another bench, one floor down.

The mall.

We decided to cut our losses and just meander back to the train station. Our train came, and we got comfy in our seats. We spent the next three and a half hours (this was not as fast nor as crazy a train as the X2000 - we've nicknamed it the X1999) ogling our son, as he cooed and smiled and moved his limbs in odd patterns, and that made the whole day worth it.

Week Nine

2010-02-17T12:52:00.001+01:00

I discovered this picture in my Picasa folder after Keith had uploaded some new photos. I was not privy to this photo shoot, so I emailed the photographer himself to ask what was going on here. The response was, "It's complicated." I'll say.

This week Elijah officially turned two months, and we visited the doctor for his two-month check-up. All is well, and he's put on a whole kilo since our last visit, weighing in at 5.7kg/12.5lbs, and measures 61.5cm/24.2 inches. He was also complimented on his neck strength, which is completely due to Keith. I seem to have an aversion to tummy time, but Keith very diligently practices this with Elijah every day.

Elijah seems to have discovered some internal clock that goes off each morning at 5 (5 AM, just to be clear). I don't know why this clock trumps the one that had been going off oh-so-nicely at 6am or sometimes even 7am, but it does. On the flip side, he seems to pretty consistently be going to in the evenings between 6 and 7. I just started reading The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley, on the recommendation of a friend (thanks, J). It is basically a third alternative to either letting your kid "cry it out" or "sucking it up" and being exhausted for the next three years.

Also in the sleeping realm, I think I've discovered that when I drink copious amounts of coffee it actually does affect Elijah's sleep. I noticed this particularly after our Haiti Fika last week, where I drank several cups of Swedish [super strength] coffee much later in the day than I usually do. Also, being the sleep-deprived person that I am these days, I've been clinging to my caffeine comfort just a little more than usual, downing more cups at home and more lattes at charming cafes than I typically do.

We seem to have a delicious case of Hand to Mouth Disease. I wouldn't go so far as to say that Elijah has discovered his hand, but he certainly is expelling a lot more spit onto it as it's in his mouth a lot more. We're still waiting for the "Aha!" moment when he realizes that it's not just A hand, but HIS hand.

That's week Nine, in a nutshell.